I’ll never understand why this happened with him and to be honest, four years ago you weren’t even a thought in our heads. You have maybe heard about me or just know of me. Who knows what he is calling it these days. God only knows what he has told you about me, part of me doesn’t even want to know. I’m almost certain it is more bad than good, but that’s because he has a tendency to run from things that touch him emotionally. You see, you are not only in love with my first love but my ex-best friend, and for that reason, I am secretly cheering the two of you on from afar.

There are a few things that you need to know about before you take on this crazy adventure hand in hand with him. His past is deep, dark and cloudy. Don’t force him to talk it will happen when he is ready. If you truly believe in him, wait. Wait for him to peel back those layers because the soul of his is like one you will never encounter again.

He’s an asshole, but I promise you it’s in the funniest way possible. He will have you laughing until you have tears in your eyes, and pain so deep in your stomach you’ll be forced to stop. When he’s hurt he’ll say things out of spite. Don’t take offense to it, just give him space. But always come back, never leave. Trust me if he is loving you he wants you there, he doesn’t just let anyone in.

He will almost always push your buttons; he loves to test people. He won’t always make the right choices or know exactly how to handle a situation and that is when he will need you the most. Be his best friend. Be his biggest cheerleader. And NEVER let him feel as though he is not valued.

His favorite baseball team is the Red Socks. And football? Die hard Notre Dame. If you’re with him you probably love sports too, which will most definitely come in handy since his weekends are consumed with football. But if you don’t know anything about anything, show up with a bottle of Advil on a Saturday afternoon and start asking 100 questions about the game, I’ve been there done that.

You probably think I hate you or have some deep resentment toward you, but in all honesty, I don’t. Over the years I’ve learned that some people enter your life to make a lasting impact but are not meant to stay. I’ll never really understand why it wasn’t him, but God’s plan is always bigger than our own, and for him his plan was you.

Eventually, you’ll figure all this out and then some, knowing him like the back of your hand. You’re loving the man, and I loved the boy. The man who deserves the entire world and then some. Don’t break his heart. Kiss him goodnight. And don’t take the responsibility of loving him lightly.

Sincerely,

The one who loved him first