Sorority/Fraternity recruitment has come and gone, but lately I have been thinking about the people who had gone through and ended the week differently than they thought they would.
(Disclaimer: This is not an article bashing Greek life.)
To the girl who didn't find her home in Greek life,
I understand that in college Greek life can be a big deal. Hundreds of girls go through recruitment, and it is not an easy process. You plan outfits weeks in advance. You research the philanthropies, and you meet the sisters. You find your top house, and you pray that on bid day, that house will love you right back.
But, sometimes things don't go according to plan.
I just want to let you know that if you found yourself in that boat, that it's OK.
Girls who walk away from recruitment week disappointed, or confused, always ask the same thing: "What do I do now?" But, the answer is simple: You don't let it ruin your semester, or your year, or your college experience. You need to remember that you only met these girls for short periods of time--so you can't let this define you.
You need to remember that these sorority houses know what they are looking for. If you didn't get a bid from them, it doesn't mean that they dislike you--or don't want to still be friends. Maybe they didn't get to know you well enough, or maybe you are meant to be involved in something else. I am a firm believer in "everything happens for a reason", and I truly believe that Greek life really isn't for everyone.
You see, while Greek life can definitely be a great thing, it is not the only thing.
Most colleges pride themselves on the amount of clubs and organizations offered on campus. My school, for example, has over eighty clubs and organizations. Only fourteen of those clubs and organizations are (social) Greek organizations. This means that life doesn't just end once you don't make it into a sorority/fraternity. It means that you still have sixty six other options.
Some of those options include joining an honors society. It might not exactly be the form of Greek life that you had envisioned, but it is something that might benefit you not only now, but also in the future. Honors societies will allow you to form friendships with peers that share similar interests and career goals, while forming lifelong networking connections.
I also want to remind you that you do have the option of going through recruitment again next year. I would encourage anyone to do so, but to do so cautiously. There's nothing wrong with a little perseverance, but don't work yourself up in case you get the same results. Use what you learned the year before to aid you in your second attempt.
If you are reading this and you are feeling sad, or confused, or jealous, or angry, or a multitude of other emotions: I want you to know that you aren't alone. Hundreds of girls rush, and only some make it. You aren't being singled out. It isn't because your hair wasn't curly enough, or you dress wasn't cute enough. It's not because they dislike you, or because they don't want to be friends. --Remember: You are unique, and amazing, and beautiful, and they would have been lucky to have you.
You aren't the only one feeling this way, and it is OK to be upset.
But please, please, please: Don't let it define you.
Sincerely,
The girl who didn't find her home in Greek, and is OK with that.
