Hi, it's me, your local plucky best friend with a golden sense of humor. At least, that's what I've always said I am in relation to my friend's main character status in the movie of our lives.

I don't mind it most days, it's fun to be known as the funny one.

However, after 20 years of being the sidekick in the movie of my own life, it's starting to get stale.

I'm 20 years old, and I've never had a boyfriend.

I'm 20 years old, and I have not been on a date in five years.

I'm 20 years old, and I've never had a member of the opposite sex compliment me on my appearance.

I'm 20 years old, and I've always been overlooked.

Those first two points don't really bother me, I don't need society to dictate when I should date and for how long.

However, those last two... they hurt.

For years, I have told myself that it doesn't matter what men think of me. I love myself, I cherish myself, and I know my own worth.

That's ALL that matters... but it isn't.

No, you absolutely don't NEED a man's love and affection to feel validated and worthy, you are already worthy of love and happiness without a man's love.

However, being told, even just once, that you're pretty...that can make a world of a difference in one's self-confidence.

On the flip side of that, the absolute worst blow to one's confidence comes when a guy you like chooses your friend.

THAT hurts.

It wasn't until my senior year of high school that I truly realized just how much it hurts to genuinely have feelings for a person only for you to realize that person has feelings for your friend.

Now, it's neither person's fault because you just can't help who you develop feelings for.

However, that doesn't stop the stinging pain of rejection that courses through your veins when you realize that, once again, you've been told to sit second chair.

It's not just taking the backseat in terms of relationships that hurt, in most cases, it's the pain that comes with being overlooked by total strangers that hurts the most.

In my personal experiences, there has been no greater blow to my self-confidence than when I walked into a store in the mall about six months ago.

I was extremely confident that day, so confident that I felt like I could walk a runway. That all came to a screeching halt when I walked into a store with my best friend.

As soon as we walked in, the salesperson immediately walked up to my best friend and started complimenting her.

"Oh my gosh! You're so gorgeous! Your hair is beautiful, and your makeup is so amazing!"

This continued for the duration of our 30-minute venture with every single sales associate coming over to compliment my best friend.

It wasn't her fault that she was getting all of these compliments, she is definitely gorgeous! She's loving, kind, and she really does have great hair.

However, standing in that small store surrounded by people who seemed to have hundreds of compliments for my best friend and none for me, I couldn't help but feel like I'd been knocked down 12 pegs on the confidence pole.

I was able to ignore the constant comments, I was used to it, to a point.

That point was when my best friend received one final comment, and I finally received one too!

"Oh my gosh girl, you're so beautiful!"

*salesperson sees me standing beside my best friend*

"Oh... and you're pretty too!"

I felt like I had been punched in the gut by a frozen fish, then God I have a good poker face.

This wasn't the first time that this has happened, and this won't be the last.

I'm not naive enough to believe that.

After 20 years of being shoved in the back of the cupboard with expired ramen, it's easy to expect this type of treatment.

However, that doesn't mean I deserve it, and neither do you.

You do not deserve to feel as if you're second best.

You do not deserve to feel as if you're not worth being someone's first choice.

You do not deserve to feel as if you are not worthy of love.

You do not deserve to feel as if you are not worthy of compliments and adoration.

You are worthy of the highest compliments.

You are worthy of adoration and love.

You are worthy of second glances in crowded rooms.

You are worth double takes when you walk down the street.

You are worth being someone's first and only choice.

I am still hurting daily, and I will always deal with these feelings of inadequacy. They're not things that just disappear overnight or even over years.

The only way that these feelings can get better is if you repeat this mantra every night.

I love myself.

I love my mind.

I love my sense of humor.

I love my taste in movies and TV shows.

I am loved.

I am appreciated.

I am worthy of love and adoration.

I am worthy of being someone's first choice.

I am important.

I can't guarantee that these feelings of inadequacy or the pain of rejection will ever go away, but they can dull.

Just because someone doesn't see your worth, doesn't mean it does not exist.

So, keep that pretty little head up and continue showing humanity just how worthy you are.