How to work out a fight with my boyfriend | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Relationships

Relationships Can Be Tricky, Here Are 5 Tips You Should Keep In Mind Next Time You Have A Fight

Is all really fair in love and war?

114
Relationships Can Be Tricky, Here Are 5 Tips You Should Keep In Mind Next Time You Have A Fight
Elizabeth Donado

In This Article:

I've been in a relationship for eight years, and as I said in the title, relationships can be tricky. One minute you're ok, the next minute you're being passive aggressive because your significant other stole a French fry from your plate after they already said they weren't hungry. Instead of letting shit hit the fan, have you thought about how to handle your arguments in a more, well, civil manner? I know it's easy to say that you can handle any argument or that you never lose your cool, but it's actually pretty common for you or your significant other to do these five things.

1. Stop yelling.

Giphy

Even though you don't realize it, you're probably yelling at your boyfriend or girlfriend. That's understandable, things are getting heated and naturally as a human being you just raise your voice when you feel like you need to get your message across. Well, as loud as you may get, yelling isn't going to get your point across l. Take a step back, breathe, lower your tone and proceed to, calmly, speak. The both of you will notice an overall tonal change not only in your voices but the overall atmosphere of your argument. You'll both feel less inclined to feel like you're being scolded by the other person and be less on the defense and way more willing to hear the other one out.

2. Actually hear their side.

Giphy

A lot of the time arguments continue because the other person feels like they aren't being heard. Also, a lot of the time arguments happen because of miscommunication. Start front the beginning, ask them to tell them where their side started and how it got here. Maybe you both can find a common point in your sides that can help you break down the cause of your fight. Breaking things down can help the both of you better understand how you got to this place, it can even help you or them pinpoint the “flaws" in time of events. Basically, communication is key.

3. Don’t post about your fights.

Giphy

Look, I know how bad you want to post on insta or Twitter about how much of a f*ck boy or prissy b**** your s/o is being. Airing out your dirty laundry does not make you feel better. It just shows your immaturity and honestly will just make the situation way worse. Your argument is between you and your partner, Billy, Susan and the white knight trying to take your side do not need to add their input.

4. Do not use offensive language.

Giphy

Using offensive language makes things way worse. This is a given. The moment you start calling each other names is the moment all respect for you or them has gone out the window. It’s easy to get lost in the moment and you can and probably will say something or call them something you mean. Sure, but it doesn’t make it ok. Bringing your selves down to a level where all emotional caution is just thrown out the window just allows this behavior to continue in the future. This is obviously unhealthy for you and them, and it is also a form of verbal abuse. No one deserves to be degraded by name calling and feel like their respect and worth is being torn down.

So quit the name calling.

5. Step away and reconvene.

Giphy

If 1-4 didn’t work out and things just seem to be heating up even more, just stop. Take a hard stop from the conversation and get some space for a little bit. Sometimes taking a few minutes or hours from your argument is the best option. This gives you both time to take a breather and really reflect on what has been said and what you want to say next. Sometimes taking a break from the fight makes you realize that your fight is pretty pointless. When you’re stuck in the heat of the moment, everything seems so frustrating and crazy. Taking a step back can make you realize that fighting over a dirty dish really makes no sense.

Obviously, if your issues are larger than what has been depicted, you both should seek out help. Relationship counseling is a real service that is readily available. If you feel that you are no longer safe because of your argument or your relationship, please seek out help.

Below are links to relationship counseling and emergency hotline information in the case of an emergency.

National Domestic Violence Hotline
800-799-SAFE (7233)
Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week
http://www.ndvh.org

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Kardashians
W Magazine

Whether you love them or hate them, it's undeniable the Kardashian/ Jenner family has built an enormous business empire. Ranging from apps, fashion lines, boutiques, beauty products, books, television shows, etc. this bunch has shown they are insane business moguls. Here are seven reasons why the Kardashian/ Jenner family should be applauded for their intelligent business tactics.

Keep Reading...Show less
friends
Photo by Elizeu Dias on Unsplash

If I have learned one thing in my lifetime, it is that friends are a privilege. No one is required to give you their company and yet there is some sort of shared connection that keeps you together. And from that friendship, you may even find yourself lucky enough to have a few more friends, thus forming a group. Here are just a few signs that prove your current friend group is the ultimate friend group.

Keep Reading...Show less
ross and monica
FanPop

When it comes to television, there’s very few sets of on-screen siblings that a lot of us can relate to. Only those who have grown up with siblings knows what it feels like to fight, prank, and love a sibling. Ross and Monica Geller were definitely overbearing and overshared some things through the series of "Friends," but they captured perfectly what real siblings feel in real life. Some of their antics were funny, some were a little weird but all of them are completely relatable to brothers and sisters everywhere.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Types Of Sorority Girls

Who really makes up your chapter...

3096
Sorority Girls
Owl Eyes Magazine

College is a great place to meet people, especially through Greek life. If you look closely at sororities, you'll quickly see there are many different types of girls you will meet.

1. The Legacy.

Her sister was a member, her mom was a member, all of her aunts were members, and her grandma was a member. She has been waiting her whole life to wear these letters and cried hysterically on bid day. Although she can act entitled at times, you can bet she is one of the most enthusiastic sisters.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

10 Reasons Why Life Is Better In The Summertime

Winter blues got you down? Summer is just around the corner!

2700
coconut tree near shore within mountain range
Photo by Elizeu Dias on Unsplash

Every kid in college and/or high school dreams of summer the moment they walk through the door on the first day back in September. It becomes harder and harder to focus in classes and while doing assignments as the days get closer. The winter has been lagging, the days are short and dark, and no one is quite themselves due to lack of energy and sunlight. Let's face it: life is ten times better in the summertime.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments