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The Art Of Getting Ready In The Car

As told by an irrational rusher

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The Art Of Getting Ready In The Car
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Imagine this situation for me: You wake up in the morning at the normal time and begin to get ready for work. You take a shower, dry your hair, and get dressed. Suddenly, your boss calls you and tells you to come in two hours later than normal. *End hypothetical situation.*

What would you do? The average person would most likely take advantage of being ahead of schedule. Right? They'd either nap, finish getting ready, then leave for work on time or skip the nap and get to work a bit early. Me on the other hand?

Naturally, I'd see this as a perfect opportunity to try out some new makeup techniques— maybe even attempt a challenging cut crease or two. I'd possibly try out some new hairstyles, scrub my room top to bottom, or clean out my car. I will use every bit of my extra time to do unnecessary extra things until the last minute.

Because of this fun little character fault, I'm always causing myself to rush FOR ABSOLUTELY NO REASON. Sound familiar? You may be a chronic and irrational rusher like me! And, if you are, you're probably getting ready in your car on a regular basis. It's bound to happen when you're constantly checking the time and realizing you should have left 10 minutes prior.

Since the car routine is nothing new to you, you probably think you're pretty good at it. Right? And maybe you are but, I'm telling you, I've really got this thing down pact to an embarrassing extent.

Here are my 10 cardinal rules of successfully getting ready in the car:

1. BRING. IT. ALL.

You may remember all your makeup if you try to grab the few items you think you need for the "car makeup" routine, but you'll probably forget your makeup remover to fix the mistakes that are bound to happen. So you might as well just take your whole bag with you. Overkill? No way! You never know what you're going to need, you unprepared psycho!


Tip: You can also always just buy one of those mini-sized packs from the dollar section in Target, Walmart, etc. and keep it in your glove compartment.

2. Your cup holders are now your ~makeup cup~ holders. Ooo, ahhh... fancy.

Don't go rummaging through your makeup bag at every stoplight. You don't need to be wasting any more time than you already have!



Tip: Throw all the essentials into a cup and stick it in your cup holder. If you're getting ready in the car more than you'd like to admit, find some cute cups or containers that match your room and leave your makeup in there all the time. That way, all you have to do is take the cup in and out of the car and nothing gets misplaced, if you're lucky.

3. Don't even attempt deodorant.

The ultimate rusher is always throwing everything into her messy Mary Poppins bag without a care... and then most likely throwing that bag into her car. AKA that ~ish~ is probably broken. DO NOT OPEN, or you and the car you practically live out of will be covered in the dreaded deodorant crumbles.



Tip: Use spray deodorant.

4. Potholes + Power = Disaster.

The second you think about taking your powder makeup out in the car, your compact is as good as broken and your loose powder is already all over your floor mats. Potholes will send your makeup flying out of your lap, crush it, and, thus, crush your heart.

Tip: There's really no way around this one. Don't even take loose power out in your car. If you're going to use powder, use a compact and use it once you've parked.

5. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day— choose wisely.

Just because we're rushing doesn't mean we have to skip breakfast! Where there's a will there's a way for a skilled rusher.

Tip: If you're eating a bagel, put it together like a sandwich so that you don't end up with a cream cheese covered car carpet. If you're eating a breakfast sandwich, make it with/ask for fried egg instead of scrambled so the eggies don't fall out all over your car. Wrap everything in aluminum foil so it doesn't drip or spill from the bottom. Boom. Brilliant.

5. Perfect the three classic rushed hairstyles.

Know the classic rushed hairstyles (messy bun, half up half down, or the more professional top knot), and know them well.

Tip: Always keep three things in your car or purse: hair ties, bobby pins, and hairspray. The dollar section at Walmart, Target, etc. is good for finding mini versions of these too.

6. Prepare for a mess.

Some messes are more permanent than a little compact powder or bagel crumbles, and you're not going to want to be a walking representation of your messy morning.

Tip: Keep one in your purse. Keep one in your car. Hell, keep one in your pocket. Tide to Go your whole life. You can also keep a big, old T-shirt handy. Lay it on your lap or tuck it into the neck top of your shirt as a bib like the big baby you are (really, grow up and get ready on time in the comfort of your own home) while attempting your routine.

8. Avoid waterproof and water-resistant makeup.


To avoid said mess as much as possible, don't use waterproof eye makeup or drying "liquid lipsticks" while in the car. Your T-shirt bib and Tide to Go are no match for those suckers.

Tip: Stick to just using chapstick while in the car and then apply your lipstick later (you'll still look put together without it). Try tinted chapsticks!

9. If you're the passenger, don't think you're in the clear.

Doing all of this nonsense in the passenger seat rather than the driver seat is obviously more ideal, but it's not much easier. You're still going through the same bumps, twists, turns, and potholes.

Tip: Don't do your makeup in the passenger seat of someone who does not wear makeup. They won't understand and will most likely fly over potholes without saying a world, and you'll end up looking like the photo above.

10. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO MAKE YOURSELF LOOK BETTER WHILE DRIVING, YOU IRRATIONAL CRAZY PERSON.

You will end up with makeup smudges all over your face, clothes, and car. More importantly, like texting while driving, doing your makeup or hair while driving can be dangerous. DO NOT DO THIS STUFF WHILE YOUR CAR IS IN MOTION.

Tip: Ideally, we shouldn't be getting ready on the road at all, but I know you other chronic rushers out there aren't gonna stop turning your car into your beauty studio/second home anytime soon. So if you must, be careful, crazies. Stop lights and parking lots people, stop lights and parking lots.

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