If you've ever been in a band, or you've managed one (though, if you've done one, you've probably done the other, and likely at the same time), you know that making local shows work is its own full-time job, never mind just playing the damn music. I don't wanna miss my deadline for an article this week, and I've got two gigs myself (playing and promoting both), so here are the six stages of trying to get people to go to your gig!
1. Excitement
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This is the feeling of getting the gig, making the event page, inviting everyone and the initial band practices.
When you've got weeks ahead of you before the show, all you can do is jump up and down about how you can't wait and how it's going to be huge and how much fun it's going to be. Your bandmates are right along there with you, jumping up and down.
So much time to practice, too! God, why does there have to be so much time between now and then!?
2. Worry
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You ride the first emotion right up until the last couple of weeks before the show. At that point, you realize you haven't practiced enough, you haven't gotten enough RSVPs, and you definitely haven't been posting enough about it on the seven social media pages you're supposed to be running, you sorry excuse for a manager.
After a night of freaking out and wondering about all those "maybes" on the event page, you're ready for the next stage.
3. Bargaining
The Simpsons, Twentieth Century Fox
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This is the point where you're trying to talk the band into practicing nearly every day or every other day until the show.
You'll cancel your other appointments, skip the gym, whatever. You'll make any sacrifice of time you can to get everyone together at least a few times. Moreover, this is the point where you start messaging all those maybes and all the no-replies: "Hey, man! Do you think you can make it to the show?..well what if I bought your ticket?...OK, but what if I bought her ticket, too...please come."
4. Despair
Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Lucas Films LTD
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Band practices have many more moments of empty silence. Tensions are building, and you're just hoping that the drummer will get that damn fill right before the show, lest the timing of the entire song be thrown off in front of everyone.
You haven't sold as many tickets as you'd like and you wonder if you're ever going to make enough money from these things for some studio time—ahh, to hell with it. Maybe you'll just split up the pay and just share a couple pints after the show.
You look at those maybes on the event page one last time before you decide that they're definitely not going, and you almost consider doing the same thing.
5. Acceptance, Nerves, And Excitement (All At Once!)
Seinfeld, 20th Century Fox
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The day's here, and you've got your lust for life back.
Who cares about all that other stuff, anyway? It's petty. You're here because of the music, man. But shit. What if you mess up? What if your crush actually decides to come (she was a maybe) and you mess up that solo you've been having trouble with? God forbid your voice breaks while you're singing that low part.
Oh god please don't mess that part up. Wait? We're on? Now? Alright alright...one more drink.
6. Gratitude (The Afterglow)
The Shawshank Redemption, Castle Rock Entertainment
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In spite of every anxious cell in your stupid body and any doubts and insecurities you may still have, you all pulled it off and the audience was very generous.
Speaking of generosity, ye of little faith, more of those maybes came than you were expecting—and, as always, the remaining stragglers have assured you they'll "get you next time, man, but [they're] sure you did great!" But now you can sit back, have a few drinks, and enjoy the other bands.
That wasn't just some bullshit pep talk. In spite of what it does to you at times, this is really all just about the music.
