After hours of highway travel on their return from vacation at Disney World, the Johnson family reveled at the sight of the sign for Quiznos adjoined with an Exxon station amidst endless miles of signs for South of the Border.

The family pulled off of the highway in their 2004 Chrysler Town and Country to see Quiznos glowing in the distance. The Johnson kids threw open the sliding doors of their minivan and raced inside. It felt like Christmas. Inside, the family was thrilled to find minimally cleaned restrooms with that signature gas station bathroom smell. The gas station was filled with delectable treats like boiled peanuts, pork rinds, and pickled hog's feet.

The Johnson's were delighted as they walked into the Quiznos to find a depressingly empty restaurant with no sign of an employee in sight. They were thrilled after 20 minutes of waiting for an employee and dozens of "hello, is anyone there?" to finally find a single employee who casually waltzed to the counter and took her time to put on her gloves finally saying, "can I help you?" in that signature sassy tone. After the glacially slow speed of their food being created, the Johnsons finally sat down and enjoyed a wonderfully subpar meal with Creed playing in the background. "A five-star eating establishment indeed," said Mr. Johnson.