In April 2015, Kristen Stewart was spotted in public with her girlfriend at the time, Alicia Cargile. The two held hands and displayed affection on multiple occasions. Though the two were obviously romantically involved with one another, the Daily Mail refused to label them as such. Instead, they were called “gal pals” – in several different ridiculous ways:
“Going public? Birthday girl Kristen Stewart holds hands with her gal pal Alicia Cargile in downtown LA.”
“Kristen Stewart enjoys lunch with gal pal after admitting her relationship with ex Robert Pattinson was turned into a 'product.’”
“Kristen Stewart gets touchy-feely with her live-in gal pal Alicia Cargile as they celebrate star's 25th birthday at Coachella.”
Live-in gal pal? Really?
Just say it, Daily Mail.
GIRLFRIENDS.
Anyone with eyes should be able to identify what is happening – two girls do not hold hands in public and show affection if they are just “gal pals” like Daily Mail insinuates. Unfortunately, we live in a heteronormative society. Such as the phrase “innocent until proven guilty,” heteronormativity causes us to believe that others are “straight until proven gay.”
This isn’t a unique, isolated, one-time situation. This has happened other times; Cara Delevingne is another victim of the gal pal phenomenon, as seen with another Daily Mail article: “A model kiss goodbye: Cara Delevingne and Karlie Kloss exchange a friendly peck on the lips after a night out in New York.”
A “friendly peck” between two girls wouldn’t be considered the same thing between a man and a woman. If a man and a woman were to exchange the same kiss, the headlines would be quick to question whether they are dating or not. Yet, thanks to heteronormativity, no one is going to label them as such unless they explicitly do so first.
This phenomenon isn’t unique only to Daily Mail and the media, however. It’s prevalent in our everyday lives, and regular people are guilty of it as well.
In mid-November, a picture leaked of Lauren Jauregui of Fifth Harmony kissing Lucy Vives at a wedding. The two were speculated to be dating by the fans for months because of their constant presence with one another and many other hints that would suggest that they are much more than just friends. Days after the photo leaked, Lauren came out proudly in a Billboard letter, identifying herself as bisexual.
In the earlier months, people would deny that they were dating even when Lucy would fly across the world to visit Lauren and also when it was revealed that Lauren had a picture of Lucy alone as her phone background. Many people denied that they were anything more than friends for an extended period of time. Although it was pretty obvious that the bond between the two delved much deeper than just the platonic level, I let it slide because she wasn’t out at that point.
But even after her coming out and the picture leak of her kissing Lucy, some still believed that they were just friends, as seen below.
@fifthorgajsms lucy and Lauren are just friends :) childhood friends, wouldn't be weird to date a childhood friend?
— I can't say it (@camilalovesher) December 18, 2016
Okay guys seriously Lauren and Lucy are best friends and when my best friend and I see each other we also kiss for hi like don't u do that?
— Gabby Dimitrova (@Gabbie2512) November 14, 2016
Just bc Lauren and Lucy kissed doesn't mean anything. Friends make out and kiss sometimes for the hell of it. Respect her and her privacy.
— JoJo (@kidrauhlShawtyJ) November 14, 2016
The last tweet is my favorite. “Friends make out and kiss sometimes for the hell of it.”
Sure... but there was no question about her being just friends with Brad Simpson when she was rumored to be making out with him backstage at the Halo Awards, right?
Of course, we should be respectful to Lauren and any other woman and not hurl labels on them or be invasive about their privacy. However, to go so far to say that friends make out all the time platonically? That's a reach and a homophobic one at that.
Heteronormative attitudes such as this are so deeply ingrained in society that it makes me wonder if they will ever be overridden. I don’t see that happening realistically in the next century or even two centuries from now. Who knows? Maybe society will progress at a faster rate and become more open-minded about homosexuality.
Until then, we’re just gals being pals.