1. "Grandma found out about your tattoo."

Yikes.

2. "Am I ever going to get a potential son-in-law?" 

Dating is hard, mom, okay?

3. "Why do you only have three dollars in your bank account?"

It really be like that sometimes.

4. "When are you coming home?" 

5. "When was the last time you had your oil changed?"

My what?

6. "Are you getting enough sleep?" 

Uhh, yeah, sure.

7. "Looks like it's going to rain there today, better take an umbrella!"

8. Literally just pics of your pet, memes, or random gifs 

My favorite texts to be honest.

9. "Your sister is being a brat." 

10. "Check your mail."

Another one of my favorites.

11. "When you come home, we'll go shopping. Don't tell dad."

12. "I need gift ideas for mom."

*Sends this text the day before her birthday*

13. "I'm going to turn your room into a room for the cat." 

No, just no.

14. "Don't leave this weekend without taking some toilet paper back with you."

15. "You look skinny, are you eating enough?" 

If you count iced coffee as a meal, then I eat plenty.