Mothers. They can be your best friend, drive you nuts and hold you up when the weight of your life gets a little exhausting. They go through plenty of trouble to raise us and find it harder than they expected to release us into the world on our own. Sometimes, they might go a little overboard with the worrying, fretting and nagging, but it’s for no other reason than love and protection.
What I see: a bridge. What she sees: a roller coaster of doom.
When it comes down to it, your mom just wants you to be safe when she’s not around to protect you. This is the woman who held your hand while getting on and off of escalators, held you up when a big dog came around, and blew on your soup so it wouldn’t burn your mouth. And with this more independent stage of your life, that instinct to protect will hardly dissipate.
What I got: a tattoo. What she sees: the worst mistake of my life.
She really just wants you to think about your choices before making them, and to be prepared to accept your mistakes if you can’t fix them. Although it is your body and it is your life, your mom isn’t just trying to suck the fun out of it. And unless the tattoo is something exceptionally graphic, vulgar, or grammatically incorrect, she’ll probably get over it soon enough.
What I see: socks on the floor. What she sees: a catastrophic mess.
Since you were born, your mom has been cleaning up your messes: changing your diaper, wiping your gooey face, and giving you a bath after an accident with mud in the backyard. So wanting to keep things in order is a basic Mom instinct. Generally, it’s a good idea to tidy up before she shows up because she’s likely to have some sort of opinion of the way you’re living...in the most loving way of course.
What I see: a (relatively) bad grade. What she sees: stress-induced depression.
Just like her, you can’t always be perfect, and sometimes, life’s challenges just get the best of you. If you’re a generally good student, and your grades start to drop, she’s going to worry. Not because she thinks you’re slacking off, but simply because it’s an unexpected change. She might wonder about your emotional state, and what she really wants is for you to be able to talk to her about anything. Maybe you had a fight with your significant other or are feeling less than beautiful lately. Or maybe it’s nothing at all...that happens too.
What I eat: a salad with crispy instead of grilled chicken. What she sees: a greasy, unhealthy diet.
The thing that your mom has the least control over is your diet. So, she now has to trust that you’ll eat enough and eat well. She doesn’t feed you every meal anymore. So, no more high chair, no more late night breastfeeding, but the urge to keep you strong and healthy is still there. So appreciate those random hotdish deliveries, one of her many ways of saying “I love you”.
Who I love: my boyfriend. Who she sees: someone who will take her little girl away.
She knows it’s inevitable and ultimately she wants you to find someone to make you happy, but your mother wants to never let you go. The further away you drift with this person, physically or emotionally, the harder it will be hard on her. So every so often, find a way to remind her that you’ll never be too far away. Besides, the best couples encourage each other to maintain their relationships with their parents.
What I do: blow my nose once. What she sees: the flu.
It might just be a sneeze, allergies, or any other symptom far away from a symptom of death, but your mom is a nurturer and will drop everything to nurse you back to health. You’ve got to admit, this isn’t all bad. It’s certainly nice to be attended to and pampered. Especially by someone who so strongly cares about your comfort and health.
What I say: I miss you. What she hears: Please come visit right now.
...and BAM! She’s on her way over before you can say that all you wanted was to hear her voice and you’re okay. You wouldn’t want to be an inconvenience to her, after all (This is quite impossible of course). Mothers are there to cry on, to vent to and to lift the world off your shoulders for a few minutes. Her hugs and laughs make everything seem a little lighter and sometimes an unprovoked visit is the best thing ever.
Mothers are there through so much more than we realize, if not physically then deep, deep in their hearts. Everything they do and say comes from a place of lovethe greatest gift of all.
Mom, I love you. I appreciate you. And I promise I’ll never wander too far away.