This may come as a shock to most, but it is something that I must confess.

I have never been good with girls.

Now I know that this may come as a surprise, but I assure you that this is reality at its finest. I have never been able to talk to, flirt with, or date girls. Some would say that it is because of my awkward personality (no clue what they are talking about). Some may say it is because I am too serious all of the time. Others just say that I am flat-out terrible on dates. Whatever the case may be, I have come to terms with it. But, rather than just sitting there, I was proactive about finding a solution to my problem.

And the answer was babies.

Now before your mind wanders too far, let me explain. I discovered over the course of my college career that one sure-fire thing to get a girl's attention is a baby. Luckily, where I went to school, half of the staff had newborns. This caused me to develop a strategy.

If you go to my Instagram, you will notice that in my senior year, I seized the opportunity to take as many photos as I could with different babies to subconsciously associate myself as 'a guy who is good with kids.' This, in turn, would be in the back of the heads of the girls I was interested in, and, when the time was right, I would ask them out.

Now let me tell you something else – it didn’t work. I am still sitting here, a college graduate and very single. But this article is not what you may think it’s about.

Take a look at the picture above. This happens to be one of my favorite baby pictures of all times. The baby is a cutie, the guy in the picture is a perfect representation of what life in the 1990s was, and there is just a feeling of contentment with both of them that jumps off the page. Of course, I may love it so much because it is one of the few baby pictures I have of myself, and it just so happens to be with the man who raised me.

That would be my granddad. I don’t have time to get into it now, but my life story is a crazy one. Perhaps I will write about it one day, but what you need to know for now is that the man you see in the picture is the one who enabled me to have a good education, an interesting childhood, and an opportunity to go to a church that would change the course of my life forever. I have been thinking about him a lot lately. In fact, I got off the phone with him just a little while ago. And as I think about the prospect of a new school year quickly approaching, I reflect on how I felt when I left home for the first time to go to college. It is my hope that, through these transitioning times for so many, students would learn from my experiences, both good and bad, on how to stay close to their family, even if they do not have the desire to. I wish I could say I did it perfectly, but the truth of the matter is that I was very stubborn most of my college years. I left my house an angry young man. It has only been in recent months that I have come to fully appreciate everything. Here are my thoughts:

• Leave on a Good Note: Even though my grandparents raised me, growing up with them was not always cookies and kisses. They were like my parents and had all of the responsibilities a mother and father would have. That means that they encouraged me when I did well. They rebuked me when I was not using the best judgment. They laughed with me during good times and cried with me during the bad. Into my teenage years, I became a dedicated Christian and one who fell in love with Jesus and my local church. It was not so much my faith that clashed with my grandparents but rather the way I went about living it out. My top priority was to my friends and to the activities that we shared, and so whenever I was punished, the church was the first thing to go. This began to build a resentment in me that came to an ugly head when I departed for school. As an aspiring young minister, I thought it was heresy to take anybody away from the church. So, as I gained my independence after high school graduation, I left just as soon as I could. The opportunities I left for were great, but the way I left my family was not. I remember my grandfather and I had an argument on the car ride over and it left me so angry that I did not say anything to him as he left. A couple years later, he told me he pulled away with tears in his eyes. I now know I should have laid aside any differences we had and just embraced the man who raised me. So, with that being said, leave your loved ones on a good note. Do not let the petty problems of the day ruin a beautiful moment.
• Be Sure to Call – and Visit – Often: Life as a freshman was exciting! The new experience of being a young adult, the craziness of being on a campus exploding with new life for a new semester, and of course, the girls that I had no luck with all caused me to not stay in contact with my family. Now, do not misread what I am saying. Go and have a good time! Make new friends and have good, clean fun. Just do not forget to check in with your loved ones every once in a while. Even though I did not believe it, my grandparents and sister thought about me often and missed me. I went home twice that year. I called only a handful of times. Just as life changes for us when we move out, life changes for them, too. They just don’t have as much distraction. Be sure to be intentional in talking with your family. I did not catch on to this secret for a long time, but as I did, I began building a new and closer relationship with them. Just think of what I missed out on my freshman year!
• Just as Important, Pray for Them: Faith was a touchy thing to talk about in my household growing up. Everyone had their own way of thinking and processing who God was and what He could do. I was not a good witness to them growing up, but I will never forget the time I sat in my favorite professor’s office. I was going off on something stupid I thought my grandmother had done, which led me to a rant about how terrible life was growing up. In the middle of that, he stopped me with the simple question, “Joey, how much do you pray for her?” The question stopped me dead in my tracks and suddenly a deep feeling of conviction billowed over me. To that point, I had hardly prayed for them as much as I could have. I committed for the next several days to spend special time in prayer just for my family. I have kept that discipline ever since with deliberate prayers on a regular basis for the health, safety, and provision of my family.
• Become Best Friends with Your Loved Ones: As I reflect on my years in college, there was a very dark time in my life. Senior year, I had a major health concern that left me in the hospital for two weeks. In that time, my grandfather took off work, came to my hospital room, and just held my hand as I wept. He was there and the feeling was as strong a comfort as anything. Shortly after release from the ICU, my grandma came down for a week and just spent time with me. It was one of the best weeks of my college career. We went shopping and she took my friends and I out to eat every night. Due to her eccentric behavior, I laughed as hard as I ever had and she quickly became more popular than me with my friends. That was the turning point in which I saw past the flaws of my family and into their hearts. Ever since, we talk on a regular basis. I make surprise visits home and spend hours just hanging out with them. My grandma and I even text everyday (I like to rib her over her support of Hillary Clinton and she tends to chew me out for supporting Trump, even though I don’t).

In life, you will not have a stronger support group than your family. You may have great friends to encourage you along your journey, but there is always a fan club whose blood runs through your veins. Always remember to launch well, stay in touch, pray for them, and let them know just how much you love them. Then there will be that true feeling of contentment.