For a while I used to think that you learned your most important lessons from your parents, your grandparents or your teachers. However, I've found there are some things that can't be taught by those who are trying to mold you into the person they want you to be. You ultimately learn more about who you are from those you choose to surround yourself with, your friends. Everyone is different in how they relate to their friends but when it comes down to it, your friends influence who you are because they become a part of your everyday life, a part of you.

Some people are lucky and can go a whole lifetime without ever coming into a friendship that doesn't work out while others constantly run into friendships that bring them down. One of the hardest lessons I've had to learn was how to build myself back up when a "friend" was tearing me down. At first, I thought that it would pass, but as I began to realize that the situation was not changing anytime soon, I put the blame on myself because I thought it was easier. I thought I could somehow control the situation, make it better even, if I just believed it was my fault. I thought that things would go back to normal. But as the days, weeks and months passed, I realized that I was wrong. I realized that I had become a different person, less confident and more insecure because I allowed my "friends" to make me feel that way. The moment I realized I had let someone else decide who I was and what I thought about myself was the moment I decided that I needed to build myself back up. From that moment on, I didn’t care about what they thought because I wasn’t going to let them convince me to not believe in myself. I learned one of the hardest lessons then, when I decided that I didn’t need anyone to tell me to be determined, to be motivated, because I knew I could do it all on my own. I didn’t need to feel “part of the crowd” because being different was okay. Their words didn’t hurt anymore and I was happy with myself for the first time in a long time. If anything, their hurtful actions only made me want to prove them wrong even more, and so I did.

I used to wonder why I even chose their friendship in the first place, but crazy as it sounds, I’m thankful I learned how to build myself back up when I did. I’m thankful I was able to stay true to myself even when it seemed like a daunting task because I know I am better off now than I would be if I had let them continue to control how I felt about myself on a daily basis. I realize now that they were seeking some sort of power over me for unknown reasons, but I also know that I did not let them get the better of me. They didn’t deserve the satisfaction and I deserved so much better.

Occasionally I see them now and they act as if nothing ever happened, like it is all water under the bridge. On the outside, I play it calm because it is behind me. On the inside I can admit, I want to look at them and say “See! See what I did? See what I became?” I want them to know that despite their efforts to drag me down, I was able to pick up the pieces and become something greater.

So in the end I’d say I learned a valuable lesson that will stay with me throughout my life and the various situations I come across. It’s hard to keep a level head when everything seems to be going against you, but letting someone else get the better of you is not worth it. Nothing is worth you sacrificing your talents or your belief in yourself just because someone makes you feel like you aren’t good enough or don’t fit in. Keep your head held high and prove them wrong because one day, you will reach your goals and achieve your dreams and you will look back at who you used to be and think about how thankful you are that you never let them drag you down.