Choosing to join a fraternity and become a member of Greek life has by far been one of the best decisions I have ever made. Through my fraternity, I have learned so much and have had the opportunity to experience things only a select few will ever have the chance to do. However, there has always been one thing that has gotten under my skin when it comes to Greek life: the judgment and stereotypes presented by people outside of fraternities and sororities. A lot of people form their impression of Greeks from sources highlighted in the media or through popular movies such as Animal House, which is understandable—sure—but is highly inaccurate and misinformed. I want to shed a little light on some of the most common stereotypes Greeks deal with on a daily basis:
1. Ever been told you buy your friends?
This is a classic. A lot of people assume students join fraternities to just fit in and are only “friends” with each other because they wear the same letters. Well, I say whoever feels and thinks this way obviously has no understanding about what fraternal brothers actually provide for one another. Those brothers you have are the few selected men you surround yourself with who share the same ideals and aspirations as you. They are the guys you share your college experience with. During college, you may experience some of the best, or maybe some of the worst times of your life; either way, your brothers have your back through all of it. So to the people who are saying that Greeks “buy” their friends, I can tell you that we definitely are not paying enough for what we receive in return.
2. “All you guys care about is partying.”
I’m almost certain I’m not mistaken, but I cannot think of a single fraternity founded upon the idea of a good party. Each different fraternity has beliefs and principles which they have been established on for decades and even over a century for some. These principles relate to the men who join them, who in turn carry with them the same beliefs, ideals, and aspirations. Ever heard of the term philanthropy? Well, each group decides on a variety of local and national organizations to support in whatever mission is specific to them. The goal is to aid said organizations and support the communities which they benefit. Fraternities focus on making an impact both on campus and in the community. You do not have to be in a fraternity to choose to party. Any college student can do that. Choosing to join a fraternity means standing apart from the rest to join in these community service events to better yourself and better those around you.
3. “You all dress preppy and look like tools.”
Yet another classic. Fraternities are labeled as the guys choosing to wear clothing brands like Polo Ralph Lauren, Southern Tide, etc. While this is somewhat true, and a lot of fraternal men do make an effort to dress nicer, I'm just confused as to why this is a bad thing. Every student attending a university is making an investment in education to better themselves and set themselves up for success in the professional world upon graduation. So if you’re working toward a professional degree in the career field of your choice, why not treat it as such and dress professionally as well? There’s nothing wrong with looking well-groomed and taking your education seriously; doing those things will help you in a variety of ways, including networking opportunities with future employers and preparation for job interview scenarios.
4. Disrespectful towards women
This is the one stereotype, above all others, that I’m not okay with as a fraternity man. People label fraternity guys and their actions toward women based on what they have heard in the media. However, I know many different fraternities—including my own—strive to serve as gentlemen on campus and in the community to break down this stereotype. As men, we understand that women deserve to be respected and appreciated. For me personally, I’m in a committed relationship with a woman whose needs I put before my own on a daily basis. Chivalry is something to take pride in, not to steer away from. Throughout the fraternity experience, you learn a lot about respect, which will ultimately make you a better son, father, and husband, not an immature “frat star” you see in movies.
Next time you have an encounter with a fraternity man, don’t immediately write him off because of the letters he wears across his chest. Those letters do not define him, but his actions define what those letters represent each and every day. Stray away from the stereotypes and encourage those who want to make an impact on campus and in the community.
