Pop quiz!
Which of the phrases below are OK to say?
“You’re soooo skinny.”
“Why don’t you eat something?”
“You’re practically bones!”
“Haha, looks like someone missed leg day!”
“Why work out? You’re already thin enough.”
The answer: None of them.
Today it is more unacceptable than ever to shame a body for being overweight, as it should be. Bodies come in many different shapes and sizes, and nobody should feel less than good enough because of how someone else feels about their body.
S,o on that subject, let’s talk about skinny shaming.
Skinny shaming is a little more “low key” than fat shaming. It finds it’s way into song lyrics like the lyric “F*** those skinny b**ches” in "Anaconda," (imagine if the lyric was “F*** those fat b**ches”. How would we respond?). It sneaks it’s way onto social media when we make fun of a man and ask him if he even lifts, and somehow, it has begun to escape our mouths in instances when we insist that someone else eats more.
So what is this skinny shaming?
Skinny shaming is defined as inappropriate negative statements and attitudes toward another person's weight or size, as defined by Body Shaming.
Let’s talk about four myths that are associated with skinny shaming.
1. Fat shaming is worse than skinny shaming.
In preparing for this article, I have heard “skinny shaming is not nearly as bad as fat shaming” from people as well as read in articles about “thin privilege” (how thin people have an advantage in society), and my response to this is that it is not a competition. If you thought that the opposite of fat shaming was skinny shaming, let me correct you. The opposite of fat shaming is not shaming at all. I grew up being taller and having wider hips than the girls in my grade throughout junior high and high school. I will never forget being in the locker room and asking someone who I thought was my friend if I was fat when I was 13, and getting the response, “No, but you have a huge ass!” along with a laugh. I immediately looked in the mirror with my face beet red, and had that phrase echo through my mind until I graduated.
When you throw out opposite phrases to someone like, “You have no ass!” or “You’re practically bones!” those are not brushed off. Those are not laughable statements that get forgotten about in the next moment. Those people will also find themselves looking at themselves in the mirror, and wondering why they aren’t good enough or what they could possibly do to have people stop talking about the way they look.
So please, knock it off.
2. Skinny shaming only happens to women.
Oftentimes when we talk about the body shaming issue, we talk about women. “That model is too thin.” “That girl isn’t representing curvy women." “She is too….(insert reason why she isn’t good enough here)." But the skinny shaming issue branches out and includes men as well. Just like some women have a hard time losing weight no matter how much they eat or work out, some men have an issue gaining weight.
I know guys who can bench 300 and still got teased for not being the bulkiest guy at the gym. I know other guys who eat a ridiculous amount of protein in hopes of gaining muscle and it is proving to be very difficult. While men may not vocalize their feelings towards what people say about their bodies as often, the skinny shaming issue extends to men. So, ladies and gentlemen, follow what your mother told you. Let’s say it together: If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.
3. “I wasn’t skinny shaming, I was just saying….”
You were saying what? Because if you are “just saying” real women have curves, that is skinny shaming. Did you just comment how guys like girls with meat on their bodies? Very rude skinny shaming. Did you comment on how she must be anorexic because she doesn’t overindulge and likes to work out? Skinny shaming. Did you try to make yourself feel better about being bigger by putting down someone that is smaller? Skinny shaming. Did you tell him he’s too thin for….? Skinny shaming.
4. It’s better on the other side.
There is not one body type that is not met with disadvantages. For thinner people, especially women, it can be difficult to find clothes that fit right. Before the keyboard warriors disagree with me, take a second and think about it. How many clothes today can you think of that are made for curvy women, or non flatter chested women?
Along with the whole “she looks anorexic” or “he’s really skinny," thinner people also have to read ridiculous memes such as “bones are for dogs," or "Guys don't want to cuddle a stick." The grass always is going to look better on the other other side, but until you have seen life through the eyes of someone that has been skinny shamed, someone that is constantly conscious of not being curvy, and someone that would do anything it takes to gain some weight, you do not get to say, “life is easier for you." In general, let’s stop looking at the grass on the other side and start realizing that our bodies are beautiful, a gift, and the only body we should be concerned with in terms of what someone should look like.
Skinny shaming and fat shaming, I repeat, are not a competition. But both are equally not OK. With spring break coming and summer in a few months, before you shame someone else for what they look like in order to make yourself feel better, keep in mind that the harsh words that you have received about your body that have stuck in your mind will do the same to others as you judge their bodies. Skinny shaming is absolutely not okay and until you have been in a situation where you have been insulted for what you look like, think twice before you invalidate someone else and what they have gone through because of it.
