Cooking has really gotten complicated these days. Trust me it has. We have a plethora of cooking hardware; from machines that replace the mixing power of the human arm, to a chamber that brings the heat of a thousand suns to our home called Earth. We box and can every edible (sometimes non-edible) creation the world can conjure up, and ship to all seven of her continents. People have even made millions off the necessary art of cooking. Cooking has gotten complicated these days dammit…. and I wont stand for it. What happened to the days of hunting buffalo, then roasting their meat on an open flame in the middle of the wilderness. What happened to scurrying around the forest and gathering fruits and grains like a rodent in October. If the people of the Middle Ages knew how we cooked today, we would be burned at the stake. As a man who values tradition, I believe we should simplify cooking once more. We have lost touch with out roots, we must embrace the hunter and gatherer life style, and must return to what is natural for the homo-sapien species. This idea may seem a bit looney or extreme, but I am not going to propose returning to our original life style all at once. That would be delusional. We must take baby steps, we must eliminate fork.
Like cooking as a whole, the gadget genre known as eating utensils has gotten a bit involved. Like a common hoarder, we collect an endless supply of eating tools. We have families of knifes, spoons, forks, nut-crackers, chopsticks, and the list goes on. Do we really need the fork. Essentially all the fork is, is a strange devices confused on wether to be a knife or a spoon. Its only purpose it pry dry food from your plate, and lead them on a path to your gullet. A task a knife could easily complete. Forks do not assist in the cutting of foodstuff like the knife, and are even incapable of providing a vessel for liquid nutrition like the spoon. You may be questioning the validity of the above argument. You may be saying,what about food cut into small bites, a knife or spoon could not pick those up, that is a job for a fork. While my imaginary version of you may be correct, I will assure you all food objects can be taken off of your plate with a spoon or a knife. Spoons may be used to scoop up the smaller food objects, whereas knifes are excellent jabbing tools for large chunks of food such as steaks and burritos. It’s as simple is that.
In addition to being a somewhat obsolete utensil when compared to the spoon and knife, the fork is an economic burden. Think of all the money society could have saved if forks did not exist. They force us to mine a little closer to the earth’s molten core, stores to add additional displays, and they give the everyday consumer one more aggravating object to purchase. Looking closely, the fork is merely a cheap stick of metal, plastic, or wood with three long fingers attached to it. An individual from does not cost much to make, however in the grand scheme of things forks cost a fortune. Millions of forks are produced yearly, millions of forks which have to be manufactured, boxed, shipped, and displayed. Forks whose costs skyrocket. Hell if it wasn’t for forks the stock market would never have crashed in 1929, and the Great Depression would never have existed. Forks screwed up an entire decade, and we must put an end to them.
Forks are an unnecessary utensil, merely taking up more cupboard space. They serve fewer purposes than other utensils, and are honestly a bit obsolete. While my proposal of eliminating the fork may seem a bit ridiculous, it can be done. We could even put little prongs at the end of spoons if idea of a frokless society is still scary to some. Forks are financially irresponsible, and are the lack the logic of other eating tools. By giving up the fork we will begin the long road of deglamorizing cooking. We will embark on the journey to return to out natural animalistic eating behaviors. All in all forks are unnecessary, who needs them anyways.
