Jonathan Lockwood Huie perfectly says it: "Forgive others, not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace." In most walks of life, people will mess up. Friends will become enemies, secrets will be told, promises will be broken. The one thing left in all of that madness? Forgiveness. We are not talking about forgiving one another in order to rebuild a friendship or a relationship from its foundation. You constantly hear people giving advice about how it is better to forgive others than to hold a grudge. To me, part of that just does not sound right. Why would I forgive someone for what they have done? Is it because they deserve it? Is it because their moral compass strayed away from their normal path?
The answer can be found not in the other person, but in yourself. You do not forgive others because they deserve it, but you forgive them for your own sake. Allowing this grudge, this bitterness, to subside from within you translates into this euphoric feeling of relief. It is something almost indescribable. Instead of focusing on the actions of the others, it is better to take that energy and use it to love yourself. Take that time to really understand yourself rather than figure out how and why people may be the way they are. So, where am I going with this? I am saying that people who are deserving of your forgiveness should get it but even the one's you believe do not should as well. That is not because they need it, but because your inner spirit does.
By freeing that part of your life, you give yourself time to really develop the relationships you truly care about. By making amends with those who have hurt you, the weight of the burden these people caused you will vanish. It is not a one step fix to all your problems and it is certainly not something that you can go by in every situation. But, if there are those people that are dragging your life in the opposite direction because of the actions they have done, it is time to move on for your own sake. It is time to find your inner peace in order to allow your inner spirit to thrive and become who it should be, not who they have dictated you to be.
So, Jonathan Lockwood Huie was not too far off in what he was trying to tell us. Forgiveness is a way that we can take certain people in our lives and rid ourselves of all the pain they have caused us. It won't be an easy road, but it is a road well worth taking; not for their sake but for your own.