Forgiveness is one of the purest intangible forms of inner strength, but it is truly also one of the hardest things to quickly adapt to, especially when an apology is never offered.

Like everyone, I have had individuals and situations that have hurt me, and the list of instances vary from A to Z, but I didn’t realize how important it is to forgive someone until about two years ago. I lost sleep thinking of reasons I was mistreated as I worried over what was being said or thought of me. I tumbled with what the final outcome would be when in all actuality, I should have just been more focused on forgiving instead of dwelling in such bitterness.

Sometimes situations happen that we feel we don’t deserve, and it’s normal to feel as though God is punishing us for some reason. But in some cases, He may just be testing us. How will we react? What will be our response? Will we chose to be bound in bitterness? Forgiveness doesn’t excuse others behavior, but instead, prevents their behavior from destroying your heart. It is no doubt difficult to say you forgive someone for something that caused hurt or discouragement, but the thing is- you aren’t doing it for them, you’re doing it for yourself. Anyone can hold a grudge, but it takes a person with character to forgive. When you forgive, you release yourself from a painful burden. It doesn’t mean you’re okay, and it doesn’t mean that person should still be welcomed into your life. It just means you have made peace with the pain, and are ready to let it go. They caused the first wound, but it is very possible for you to cause the rest. It becomes a never ending cycle of bathing in the hurt, anger, resentment and hatred. Before you know it, you are poisoning yourself while the cause rests easy.

It is no easy task to accept an apology that was never spoken, but in order to receive complete peace? It must be done. Sometimes people don’t apologize because they are ashamed; they suffer deeply within themselves and those sufferings are spilling over. They don’t deserve a punishment, but they do deserve your help and prayers. That’s the message that’s really being sent. It is not a sign of weakness, but a commitment. It is a choice to show mercy and understanding, not hold the offense against the offender. It is a true example of love and maturity to understand their situation and choice to move forward. The same boiling water that softens the potato, hardens the egg. It’s about of which you’re made. If your heart is set on Christ's forgiveness, with training, that forgiveness will become more of an instinct upon exposure. God sent His only son for a whole world full of sin, hatred, discrimination, unjust actions and rejection to His words which broke His heart. That is love. That is forgiveness. We were the most unworthy and undeserving yet, His love held no record of wrong. I have given God countless reasons not to love me and yet none of them has been strong enough to change Him.

That is the same compassion we should show to others. Forgiveness unblocks your blessing, and it gives a freedom that humbles you before those who hurt you. In turn, they might want to know the source of such mercy.