I spent most of high-school avoiding the idea of dating, but not for predictable reasons. I wasn't afraid to date. I wasn't too shy to make a move. I wasn't afraid that dating would compromise my faith. I knew I could handle myself. So, what was my issue? Well, honestly, I simply wasn't interested in the idea of dating, mostly because I had never witnessed multiple examples of a healthy dating relationship. In my experience, dating led to a controlling, manipulative, and psychologically damaging relationship. I've never been willing to do what someone else wanted me to do just to be accepted. I preferred to put my time and energy into my family, people I knew accepted me without change.

Now, don't get me wrong. It's not as if I NEVER wanted to date. Of course I thought about it now and then, but in the end, I realized maybe it wasn't worth it. So, I moved to college and this mind set stuck with me. Sometimes, this decision causes me some self-esteem issues, thinking maybe nobody would really even want to date me, but this is not the main reason behind my decision not to date. I prefer to wait on God's plan. I know that, if it is part of His plan, he will show me this when it is the proper time. I refuse to go searching for Prince Charming. There is no guarantee that he even exists, especially the way Hollywood portrays him. I can't be in a healthy relationship if I never learn how to be single. For now, Prince Charming exists elsewhere, in my dad, my brothers, my nephew, all those who love me for me.

So, now, I want to encourage all girls who are like me. The girls who have never dated, whether they chose this or not. You are beautiful, you are strong, and you are worthy. Just because you've made a conscious choice to look after yourself doesn't make you a failure. Don't let anybody tell you that you are making a mistake by not actively searching for your "Prince Charming." He'll find you when the time arrives. Waiting takes a certain amount of courage and faith, especially when nothing seems to be changing. But, I implore you, hang in there! You're doing fine! God is with you and He wants you to love yourself wholeheartedly before another loves you just as much.

That is not to say that any woman who looks for her soul mate is wrong. We all have different beliefs about God's methods. I'm simply advocating for us girls who have chosen to take a different approach. All women are beautiful in our own way. We all are affected by societal standards and what people think we should do to be considered "beautiful" or "worthy." We don't all have the same views, but we are all affected by similar external factors. What counts is that we rely on God to turn these external factors into positive perspectives.

I hope to one day find that person God may or may not have for me. Whether or not this is the case, I will choose to accept God's plan. In the end, He knows what is best for me. Until then, I thank Him, because I know that I will never be alone as long as I keep Him at the center of my heart and allow Him to lead all of my intentions. I know whoever He brings my way will appreciate my introverted qualities, bad puns, and ridiculous ability to quote any movie after only watching it once. I encourage those girls who are like me to stick with it! I encourage the girls who are unlike me to stick with it! Keep going and do what you believe God needs from you to the best of your ability. You don't have to answer to anyone except God and yourself. That is a lesson I have learned over time and one that I will continue to spread until all the women and girls I know feel comfortable and beautiful in their own skin.