Sometimes in life, things happen according to plan. Maybe your party goes as well as you could’ve hoped. That math test you studied day and night for ended up being a piece of cake. One kiss turns into a relationship one could only dream of. Those precious moments are not to be taken for granted. Every once in awhile, things go your way. Life seems bright. There isn’t a thing that can go wrong. Cherish that. Remember that for when times get tough. Remember for the moments when life sort of screws you over.
Earlier this week I realized that life can be a bitch. For awhile it can seem as if terrible things keep happening one right after another. I hadn’t seen life that way since spring of my junior year of high school. It’s no secret that I’ve battled severe depression and suicidal thoughts since my early high school days. I don’t hide those facts because I’m not ashamed of who I am. In the past, I made bad decisions that haunted me for ages, but it’s been years since then. Those dark moments made me who I am today. They made me able to handle the shit life throws me now. No one can take that away from me. No matter how hard they try.
What I’ve gone through this past week hasn’t affected me nearly as badly as it would have if all of this had happened two years ago, and it’s because I’m stronger now. Every day we grow as humans. We learn from our mistakes and discover how to move forward in life. One thing that always helps me is kind of juvenile, but it works! Whenever I’m feeling down, or someone around me is, I say the word POSITIVITY, then list all the positive things about life that I can think of at the moment. It sounds like something a child would do, but it honestly makes me and the people around me feel better. When I was going through the worst parts of my depression I was always told to “look at the positives in life.” Honestly, it didn’t help at first. I had to go through therapy and medication. It was a process, but now those few positive thoughts I think of every now and again are what can completely turn my day around. Try it, and you might be surprised how much it can help. Staying positive is a major way to keep yourself from getting too melancholy. It can be draining trying to be happy all the time, but it can be worth it. Sometimes that happiness can become real which makes it all worth it.
I’m writing all of this because I want people to know that whatever hell they’re going through right now, it’s not the end. Maybe your boyfriend dumped you or someone close to you passed away; no matter the situation, it’s not the end of the world. With every shit experience comes a lesson to remember in the future. Yes, life can suck. In fact, it sucks major ass sometimes, I’m not going to sugar-coat it for you. However we can always move forward. A single moment in your life doesn’t define who you are or how your life will go for as long as you live. YOU make that decision. You decide whether to let those terrible experiences destroy you from the inside out. You decide whether or not to get help. You decide whether to live in darkness or light. Don’t ever feel like you have nothing left to live for. Every day I try to find a reason to be thankful I’m still alive. It may be a simple thing like enjoying the ice cream from my university’s dining hall or maybe it’s something major like realizing that I have the most supportive and amazing friends ever to help me through anything. These little bright moments in my days are a reminder that life is worth living. Days are worth meandering through even if I have a class I don’t enjoy because good things happen. Remember the great moments for when you’re feeling down. Never forget: GROW from your past and LIVE for your future.