Hey there. How are you? Are you going to be OK? These are all questions that people ask us when we have a harsh break up. They address it to me as a person, but I sit here and ask myself the same thing. You are the part of me that keeps the rest of me alive. If you’re hurt, the rest of me is hurt too. So again, are you okay? I know you miss him, I do too, but I want to move on. Can you work with me here?
We lost him and it feels like there is no going back. I thought we were going to stay close. Even my brain was even convinced of it too. But, it seems as soon as we put things on pause, he was already slipping away. I know you were hurting before we even parted. He was acting pretty distant too. But god, when he did speak to you, I remember how you pounded away. My stomach couldn’t stop rolling over either. He really had a way to make us feel special didn’t he?
Do you remember the day that we first met him? He was so shy. Boy he was cute though! I worked so hard to get him to open up, and when he did, the connection was stronger than I’ve ever felt with anyone. We both know its cliché to say, but it felt like magic. We all grew so attached. I mean when you're talking for close to two years, waiting two years for him to come home, all you can do is talk. That's the only way to establish a true connection. Yes, we had our fights and set of mini-heartbreaks along the way, but it was really special. I know how fond you became of him.
The day he told us he wasn’t coming back for another two years…every part of me felt you break. I don’t know if I’ve ever had that strong of a reaction to someone romantically before. And when he finally said to pause us, I know that you almost fell silent. You were such a little warrior, fighting to still keep up with school and work. You are such a trooper. I can’t thank you enough for powering through it.
I know you are attached and severely hurt, but my head and I don’t want to care about him anymore. I know this has been really hard on you, and that’s why I want to move on too. You have had your fair share of heartbreak in the last few years. The rest of me is working so hard to push along and forget him. I fight so hard to not cry, but you keep pulling him back in. You’re the only thing that pushes me to look at our messages, snapchats, and his pictures. I can almost resist crying and caring when I look over them. I’ve almost deleted them a time or two, but you always stop me. You make me cry on the drop of the dime, and I don’t want to anymore.
You are so open and loving. You have so much to give and I love that about you. You are amazing, but as of right now, I don’t like it as much. You’re making this too hard to get over and because of you, I can’t get him out of my head. I’m tired of hurting. I’m tired of wanting to care because we’ve been through so much. I know I can’t force you to change, we both know how hard I’ve tried. I just need you to start moving on.
They say that it takes time to heal a broken heart and it will happen when it does. That’s the thing though, I don’t want it to take any more time. So can you let go? Can you work with the rest of me to move past him? You can be friends and you can care about him, just not in that way anymore. Can you do that for me? I just want what’s best for us and I can’t think of any other way to go about it.
What we had was amazing and life changing. I thought we were truly meant to be, but as we both know, it didn’t turn out that way. Maybe we just had the wrong timing, or maybe it truly wasn’t meant to be. Either way, I need you to put it behind you now. I need you to move along. I could be so much happier if you learned to let go of him. I know it’ll be hard, but I’ve got you. I’ll be more careful with you and we will both learn. I’m not saying that I want you to become hardened and cold. I don’t want that at all. I just need you to work to close that chapter. Make progress to shut off those reactions and feelings towards him. We can do this together, I just need you to start doing your part. I need you to help us get better and be happy.
So what do you say, can you start moving on?
