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13 Foods To Keep Off The Thanksgiving Table

Don't bring salad. Don't be that person.

Bri Prosser

Nov 20, 2017

Furman University

743

13 Foods To Keep Off The Thanksgiving Table

Moody Air Force Base

Thanksgiving is here and it's time for food. Mashed potatoes, gravy, turkey, the works. But there are some foods you people bring to Thanksgiving dinner that should have been left at home.

So if you are even thinking of showing up with a casserole dish of these, you're un-invited from Thanksgiving if you bring them.

1. Ham

This is a TURKEY holiday. Ham has its time at Christmas. Get out of here with that foolishness? Oh, there's someone who doesn't like turkey? Too bad. There are plenty of sides to fill you up.

2. Any rolls but Kings Hawaiian

When I go back for a turkey sandwich later, I want Kings Hawaiian. The sweet perfectly balances the turkey. Leave your brown n' serves.

3. Any sweet potatoes that aren't a casserole

There is only one acceptable type of sweet potato. Try again next year.

4. Potatoes that aren't mashed

Baked potatoes have no place at Thanksgiving dinner.

5. Green bean casserole

This food is an abomination. It's gross. I don't care if it is a tradition. Traditions started somewhere and traditions end somewhere. This has got to stop.

6. Dressing

Nope, this is a stuffing only zone. If it wasn't in the bird, it doesn't go on my plate.

7. Brussel sprouts

I don't eat them any other day of the year, so why would I want them messing up my Thanksgiving plate?

8. Garden peas

We have corn, cornbread, sweet potato casserole and green bean casserole at the very least. Why do I need another plain vegetable when others have brown sugar on them?

9. Salad

I'm not a rabbit. I'm not letting salad take up valuable stomach real estate on Thanksgiving. That place could be storing turkey.

10. Non-giblet gravy

It'd better have eggs in it, too. That's the best part.

11. Cake or brownies

I'm down with cake and brownies every other day of the year, but this is a pie holiday. If it isn't pumpkin, apple, or pecan, please leave.

12. Cranberry sauce not from a can

It's those little ridges that dictate how much one serving is and keeps peace amongst the chaos. Let us have our peace and one serving of cranberry sauce.

13. Squash

See also: garden peas.Useless vegetable. Get it away.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Recommended for you

13 Foods To Keep Off The Thanksgiving Table

Don't bring salad. Don't be that person.

1. Ham

2. Any rolls but Kings Hawaiian

3. Any sweet potatoes that aren't a casserole

4. Potatoes that aren't mashed

5. Green bean casserole

6. Dressing

7. Brussel sprouts

8. Garden peas

9. Salad

10. Non-giblet gravy

11. Cake or brownies

12. Cranberry sauce not from a can

13. Squash

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10 ways to prepare for finals week—beginning with getting to the library.

Who knows where we would be without them.

1. Thank you for laughing at my jokes, even when they really aren’t funny.

2. Thank you for singing unbearably loud with me all the time.

3. Thank you for letting me vent to you for hours about anything and basically being my personal therapist.

4. Thank you for ordering pizza with me at 2 in the morning.

5. Thank you for all the movie days when we don’t feel like moving.

6. Thank you for being my workout buddy everyday.

7. Thank you for sharing your closets with me.

8. Thank you for taking naps with me at random hours during the day.

9. Thank you for cleaning our home with me when we absolutely need to.

10. Thank you for all the rides when it’s late and you don’t want me to walk home alone in the dark.

11. Thank you for studying with me in our kitchen when we didn't want to go the library.

12. Thank you for making dinner with me.

13. Thank you for helping with my hair, makeup and outfit every time we go out.

14. Thank you for taking countless ugly pictures with me.

15. Thank you for not judging me when I go too long without showering.

16. Thank you for making our apartment feel like a second home.

17. Thank you for being there through all of our boy troubles.

18. Thank you for giving me a hug when I feel homesick.

19. Thank you for getting excited with me when one of us gets a good grade on an exam.

20. Thank you for still being my friend and not judging me when I say or do dumb things.

21. Thank you for telling me what I should do when I am sick.

22. Thank you for dancing horribly with me everywhere we go.

23. Thank you for staying up super late with me when we aren’t tired or can’t sleep.

24. Thank you for being super weird with me.

25. Thank you for all the unforgettable college memories.

26. And most of all, thank you for being the best friends a girl could have.

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7. "I’m going to fail. I’m going to fail."

8. "I’m dropping out of school."

9. "What grade do I have to get on the final to pass the class?"

10. "Oh, no, I have to do good."

11. "I shouldn’t have procrastinated all semester."

12. "I wanna go to bed."

13. "We did not learn this!"

14. "I should go get food."

15. "Why do we even have finals?"

16. "I don’t want to be at the library."

17. "Get off your phone."

18. "I can watch Netflix for like 20 minutes and then go back to studying."

19. "I shouldn’t have watched Netflix."

20. "You have to study now!"

The "Happiest Place on Earth" has a lot of characters with some pretty great advice.

Remember you’re the one who can fill the world with sunshine. — Snow White

The past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it. — Rafiki

You don't have time to be timid. You must be bold and daring. — Lumière

If watching is all you're gonna do, then you're gonna watch your life go by without ya. — Laverne

Sometimes the right path is not the easiest one. — Grandmother Willow

Always let your conscience be your guide. — Jiminy Cricket

To infinity and beyond. — Buzz Lightyear

Life is a journey to be experienced, not a problem to be solved. — Pooh

Let it go. — Elsa

If you can't say something nice, don't say nothin' at all. — Thumper

Today's special moments are tomorrow's memories. — Genie

It's a time of love, family, memory-making, and gift-giving. But also a time of stressing over the perfect gift.

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