"how could I say no?"

he drawled

a sprawled tired smile

i offered the brightest

i could muster in return

it did little to lighten up

the dark atmosphere hanging around

a heavy fog of loss

and smothering desire

my heart coughed

wheezing

i took a deep breath

and met his gaze

"i would ask how

you're doing, but..."

i held up the bag instead

he reached in and pulled out

a sweating bottle

its neck held firm

he wrung it around

in hand, grip tight

choking

"thanks, sweetheart"

his smile sincere

suffocating

pressing down

holding down

words he could have said

instead of

"stay for a movie?"

i nod

"of course"

i lay on the bed

both of us

head to head

clogged throats

labored breaths

asphyxiating

in the thin air

devoid of hope