So, I like food.
When I say I "like" food, I mean that I'm super obsessed with food. My life revolves around when and what my next meal will be. I can count my list of food dislikes on one hand (salmon, cilantro, and celery).
I'm less of a foodie because I'm not critical of what I eat. I think of myself as more of a garbage disposal: not picky about food, always ready to eat more, and might accidentally consume a spoon if not careful.
Way back in the stone ages of 2010, Kate Moss was quoted to have a life motto of "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels." Recently, I've heard this phrase more and more tossed around as college calories threaten to ruin what's left of our summer bodies.
Well, not to argue with the very famous and very fabulous Kate Moss, but I'm calling straight bull-doody. If this is your life motto, then you've obviously never tried half the food I have.
To celebrate the wonders of all food (and coincidentally, the wonders of all body shapes and sizes), here is a list of some of the food that tastes so much better than skinny feels, it's not even a contest.
1. Chocolate chip waffles with whipped cream, butter, and syrup.
2. McDonald's chicken nuggets.
3. Hashbrowns
4. Chicken Tikka Masala
5. Triple fudge ice cream
6. A bowl of fresh Frosted Flakes eaten before they get soggy
7. Orange chicken with a side of lo mein
8. Dark Chocolate Kit-Kats
9. Regular Kit-Kats
10. Let's just say all types of Kit-Kats are clearly better than skinny feels
11. Ruffles or Wavy Lays (I don't discriminate)
12. Pot roast with potatoes and carrots
13. German potato salad
14. Angel food cake
15. Funnel cake
16. Just. Cake.
17. Salad with Olive Garden dressing and a whole lotta croutons
18. Thin crust pizza
19. Homemade fried chicken
20. Bagels with cream cheese
21. Bagels without cream cheese
22. Cream cheese without bagels (though I tend to eat it with something else and not just plain. . .)
23. Homemade mashed potatoes
24. An excellently-cooked burger
25. An averagely-cooked, but still delicious, burger
26. Country potatoes (which are similar to hashbrowns, but so wonderfully different at the same time)
27. Chocolate mousse
28. Steak. Just steak.
29. Those little mints you get at baby showers and wedding showers and regular showers (if that's the kind of life you lead)
30. Cubed cheese
31. Na'an
32. Fried pickles
33. Bread bowls and baked potato soup from Panera Bread (yes, together)
34. Pollo Loco with Spanish rice
35. Fresh bread from the bakery
36. Nutella
37. Peanut butter toast with honey and cinnamon
38. Sea salt caramel chocolate
39. Uncrustables (especially these grape ones)
40. Chicken Caesar Salad (with fried chicken and, again, whole lotta croutons)
41. Freddy's french fries with the fry sauce
42. Chocolate chips
43. Chocolate chip cookies still warm from the oven
44. Omelets loaded down with cheese and bacon
45. Brownies
46. Fried mushrooms
47. Any club sandwich
48. Those rolls from Texas Roadhouse
49. Chocolate chip muffins
50. Nachos
This is just the tip of the food iceberg. Moral of the story: next time you think that "nothing tastes as good as skinny feels," trying eating literally any food ever, especially any on this list, and I think you'll change your tune.
