As women, we deal with a lot. We're mothers, daughters, sisters, wives, girlfriends, co-workers, bosses, and friends and we're expected to be at our best while wearing each of these vastly different colored hats. We're supposed to be able to switch gears from career mode to family mode to friend mode in the blink of an eye, and many of us do this well on most days. However, we're human and we aren't perfect. From bad hair days, and those times when Murphy's law takes center-stage in our lives, and everything that can go wrong does go wrong, to those moments when we stress-cry in our cars during breaks at the office...ALL of us have moments when we feel like we just aren't enough. It's like the weight of the world is on our shoulders, and we're slowly sinking instead of rising up. The thing is, that soul-crushing feeling of inadequacy is self-inflicted. We've forgotten that we aren't meant to be perfect at everything. In fact, we're meant to be imperfect. That's right. All of those quirky, weird, strange, and neurotic things you do? They're beautiful because they make up the woman you are and that woman is a Goddess. She's nerdy, sensual, imperfect, loving, neurotic, and absolutely fabulous, and it's time we stop trying to be perfect and just be her. Here are five ways to do just that this year.
1. Commit To You
We commit ourselves to idea and ideals of others constantly. This shows up in different areas of our lives: like how our bodies should look, how much money we should have, or the type of jobs we should take. When we do this, we freely give our power away to others, and when we don't measure up to the people that others want us to be (or even the people that we think we should be) we suffer. We self-judge and reject the qualities of ourselves that don't line up. We think that if we can just do better, be better, etc. we will finally get to that awesome happy place we've been waiting to get to. But here's the thing: there is no one better than the person you already are, and you will never find happiness if you're constantly focusing on some imaginary perfect future. So stop giving your power away by striving to be someone else and commit to being who you already are. You are the one you've been waiting for.
2. Believe In Yourself
You are amazing. Sometimes we need to be reminded of this fact. It's easy to get lost in self-doubt and fear. This is something we all struggle with, but we already have everything we need inside of ourselves to be happy and to live the life of our dreams. It's time we stopped holding ourselves back and embraced the inner warrior Goddess inside of ourselves. Try this: write down a list of excuses you say to yourself and the beliefs you have about why you can't do certain things. Be honest and dig deep. Then write down how your inability to do these things is affecting your life. Next, write down why you want to do these things. What is it you are trying to accomplish? How will doing these things positively affect your life? Now write down at least five things you can say to yourself instead of allowing self-doubt to win. Use these statements as your go to when you start to feel like you can't accomplish something.
3. Nurture Yourself
It isn't selfish to pamper yourself. In fact, you NEED to pamper yourself. You deserve it, just for being you. So, grab a glass of wine, some candles, and a bit of smell-good bubble bath and kick back. Don't you dare feel guilty about it either! Taking time out for yourself is healthy, so do it. Make time for yourself every week, every day if you can find the time. It's worth it!
4. Embrace Your Beauty
We've been told our entire lives what beauty is. It's a concept that has been defined for us by the society we live in. It's time for us to stop allowing the world to define this word for us because the truth is this: WE are beauty. Everything about us, from the shape of our bodies to the way our brains work is beautiful and once we embrace this fact, we will be unstoppable. Tell yourself how beautiful you are every day. Do it until you believe it down to the core of your being. You really, truly are beautiful. Believe it.
5. Be A Phoenix
"You've seen my descent. Now watch my rising." -Rumi
The phoenix is one of the most amazing mythical creatures ever written about. When she dies, she rises from the ashes and begins a new life. Most get hung up on this miracle alone, but I think the phoenix's power lies in the fact that she accepts her fate, knowing that she must fall in order to rise. No one likes hitting bottom. No one likes feeling pain, but we all must learn that it's okay to feel these things. We need to allow ourselves the pain of failure in order to have the strength to rise to success.
Hopefully following these five steps will remind you of that beautiful, amazing goddess of a woman you already are.