You know how sometimes you're just dying to go out to make new friends and the first thing you do when you get to the party stumble over your own name?
Same.
1. The "I swear I'm not creepy."
The first day of class, you're super excited. You look around at all the new faces in your freshman class. "This is it, this is where I will meet the life long friends everyone always talks about." You look around at everyone and find that one person. Yes, you two were meant to be the ultimate bffs. You begin planning all the future conversations you'll have. How you'll support each other through heartbreak, and take joy in each other's successes. She makes eye contact. This is where you will say something funny like in the movies and then you'll be inseparable. However, the scowl on her face clearly shows you she doesn't appreciate being stared at. Right. You smile awkwardly and turn back to the front. Hopefully, she won't file a restraining order...
2. The "oh my gosh, you're actually upset."
You're having a great time at the party you're hosting. Things are going well, people are having fun. Man, you're good. You excuse yourself to fix your hair in the bathroom when you see somebody crying on your bed. Oh no. Please no. But it's too late, they saw you, you just have to deal it with it. "Ooooh, no... darling.... what's up- I mean, what's wrong?" Good start. They then tell you how something is going really awful in their life. What do you tell them? Don't cry because your great aunt died? No, that's mean. Oh my gosh, should I tell them they have snot running down their nose. Just grab someone else, anybody else, you are no help here.
3. The "Oh, yeah, that homework is something else."
So you've been chatting with the person who sits next to you in your class. They seem super chill. You have some things in common too, that's really nice. One day you pack up and head out at the same time. Perfect! New friend time! You start talking about that thing you had in common again, but that runs dry quickly. Ahem. Ok, well homework is pretty safe, go with that. Oh yeah, you already cracked that joke about the paper in class today, darn it. The next five minutes consist of you desperately trying to figure out topics to discuss while give one word answers. Talk goshdarnit! Turns out they are going back to their dorm, and already have plans for lunch. That's chill, I guess. You say goodbye and trip over your own feet as you go on your lonely way.
4. The "I really was hoping nobody saw that."
If there is one thing you have learned at college is that someone is always watching. And that someone also always has Yik Yak. There you are, just scrolling through your yak feed, and lo and behold. Someone saw you trip/ spill food on your shirt/ wave at someone who was not waving at you. Every time. Excuse me while I go change and burn the shirt that they were describing waayyy too accurately.
5. And anytime this happens, which is honestly way too much:
But hey, I heard once that some people think being awkward is cute. So, I mean, there is something to hold on to.
