Coon. Dirty Jew. Nigger. Cracker. Brownie. Redskin. Gringo. Wetback. Honkey. Spook. Chink. Raghead. Beaner. Savage.What do all of these words have in common? Racism. These slurs are just a few of many that unfortunately exist today to fuel hate and animosity.
Racism is defined as the belief that all members of each race possess characteristics or abilities specific to that race, especially so as to distinguish it as inferior or superior to another race or races. It comes in any color and any time and place. IT has NO boundaries and no limits.
When was the first time you recognized and understood racism? For me, it was in elementary school. I attended an inner city school that was extremely ethnically diverse, a feature which I am extremely grateful for now. Picture this, 8 years old, walking to the bus and WAM, a fist makes contact with the back of your skull. The next thing I remember was looking up to my one of my best friends, Alexis ( who was also black) and my mother wiping blood and tears off of me. A black boy in my class had called me a “fat cracker,” and decided to attack me on the way to the bus.
I did not understand why but I was terrified. This event opened up the door to learning about racism. You see, I am a mutt, like many, a melting pot of Jewish, Irish, Polish and Scottish descent. I heard the many slurs growing up and jokes about dirty Jews and stick them in the oven, but I never understood any of that. Why would I? After being attacked, my black teacher explained to me that this was a hate crime. She told me that some people were not taught to love everyone and some times they just needed to be shown love and kindness and taught that being ugly to others because of how they looked was just plain mean. The little boy and I eventually became friends and the animosity ended. If only this world were as simple as this, right?
As a child, my best friends were all black; Keondra, Alexis, Lashonna and Kenyata. I can honestly say we never saw color. We played in the mud, rode four wheelers, barbies, ran from “killer clowns named IT,” camped out and played in the creeks, modeled in the water hose and sprinkler like we were America’s next top models; we just plain loved each other.
Recognize this phrase? “I’m not racist, I just don’t believe in dating outside of my race.” It is one I heard as a teenager often, both from peers and from my own parents. I recall a dear friend of mine, Kenny, asking me to go to prom with him while I was a sophomore. I asked my folks, and they told me Kenny sounded nice and sure I could go.
Well, this changed once my mother met Kenny and realized that he was a black boy. I have never known if she made the decision or made it knowing that my father would not approve, but I specifically remember going home after she picked me up from the YMCA and my father telling me that they decided I was too young to go to prom. Of course, as a teenager with PMDD and already crazy hormones, I immediately went on the defense and said, “It’s because he's black, isn’t it?” I fully expected them to deny, deny, deny, but to my surprise, my mom said no, one single time, then my dad interrupted and said, “Yes. You are not going to date a black boy. Do you not remember your sister being humiliated and ruined by that one boy, do you know what people think when they see a white girl with a black boy?”
And thus started one of many teenage rebellions. And side note, no, I did not remember anything about my sister dating a black guy or being embarrassed by it, but we are also 8 years apart. For the life of me, I could not see the big deal about it.
As a result, I try to remember to teach my children that no race is better than any other. That they should look at a person by how they treat others and one thing remains and that is love. If my children fall in love with someone of a different ethnicity, who loves them, treats them the way they deserve, and has Jesus in their heart, why on earth would I be unhappy about that? People may not believe that remarks like, “I am not racist, but….” are discriminatory, but newsflash, they are.
My 6 year old has taught me more than anything that what this world needs is love. It is amazing what a sweet, innocent, child can understand and explain at such a young age. Eli has always been brave about standing up up for others even when it may hurt him. My personal favorite was a handicapped child on the playground at school knocked to the ground, being kicked and spit on by some other kids. Eli’s teacher emailed me to say that he ran over there and shielded the child while “roaring like a lion,” and yelling “Leave him alone!” As a mother, it melted my heart and of course made me weep. As a person, it humbled me. What if all of us were ready to defend other people, of all races, from being hurt, or treated unfairly? What could America be like if it were an equal opportunity country for everyone, despite race?
I am sure you noticed the lyrical quote from the black eyed peas song, Where is the love. IF you have never seen the video, you must watch and listen to the lyrics. It is a perfect and chilling song to explain what is happening in our world. We are becoming so numbed by the news and events That we neglect to remember the importance of human lives. This next line is where I lose it and usually end up in a crying, red faced, ugly ball.
”People killin', people dyin' Children hurt and you hear them cryin' Can you practice what you preach? Or would you turn the other cheek? Father, Father, Father help us Send some guidance from above 'Cause people got me, got me questioning' Where is the love?.
And finally, it is not about those greedy republicans or those evil democrats. All too often I hear and see the assumptions that if you believe in certain stances and vote one way, then you must be a no good, dirty-rotten-pig-stealing great-great-grandfather (credit to Holes, what can I say, I am still a millennial at heart.)
I am here to tell you a simple truth. You can believe something different than someone, and still be friends. You can even vote for someone because they are the “lesser evil.” You have every right to be pro-life, pro-choice, pro immigration, anti immigration, pro weed, anti weed, pro taxing the rich, anti taxing the rich, pro welfare, anti welfare, pro gun, anti gun. You can have freedom OF religion, to choose what you believe and want to base your life off of. You can even have civil conversations with people who believe differently from you because we are Americans! WE are in the land of the free, because of the brave. The best part about it is, that you can do all of that and still love your friends who may be the complete opposite of you. Voting one way does not make you racist, being racist is what makes you racist.
My heart breaks for all of my friends and family who have been treated differently because of the color of their skin. It breaks a little more every time I hear of another hate crime or evil thing that was said to hurt someone. Your skin is your story, your heritage, it makes you the beautiful person you are! I would not change a thing about myself or anyone else. I would, however, change the way people view others as lesser than because of their ethnicity. I pray that our country will come together and rise above the hate and racism that does exist today. I pray for you!