Finding the Joy In What's Hard: Long Distance Relationships | The Odyssey Online
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Relationships

Finding the Joy In What's Hard: Long Distance Relationships

I have learned so much in this season of waiting.

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Finding the Joy In What's Hard: Long Distance Relationships
Rosanna Stewart

In all honesty, going through a long-distance relationship during college has been the absolute hardest thing I have ever done. My boyfriend Matthew and I have been dating for a little over six years, so we experienced high school together and now we're experiencing college together -- kind of. He goes to a school that's three hours away from mine and its both really wonderful and really awful. Although I miss having my best friend, the one person who knows everything about me, within ten miles of me, being forced to do this relationship thing long distance has taught me more about myself and more about Jesus than I ever could have imagined.

I figured out who I was.

Having Matthew around all the time in high school was so wonderful. We were allies, best friends, and each other's support system. We still are all of those things, but during my freshman year of college, my first time ever being apart from Matthew in four years, I had to make friends all over again. My comfort blanket was gone and I had to decide all by myself who I was and who I wanted to be. I was determined to stay true to myself and to find my niche in my school that was all my own. It was hard and I started out full of insecurities, but now I have found my niche and have discovered my passions and am fully confident in who I am.

I became comfortable in solitude.

During high school, Matthew was my constant companion and I enjoyed every single second of that. I often find myself missing and longing for those times. However, I have to remind myself that this season of long-distance is a big part of my story, and the story of our relationship. It's essential to enjoy and be present in the moment and not wish life away. In all of that, I have become comfortable being alone. In fact, I cherish the moments in the day when I have solitude and total quiet. Those moments used to scare me but now they are such a gift. Also, nothing beats having a quiet dinner alone after a long, tiring day. You should try it.

I learned that my relationship with Jesus should come before my relationship with Matthew.

This is a biggie. And I don't have this one perfected yet. But, through these two years of being apart from the person who was my whole world in high school has taught me one of the most important lessons. Jesus Christ is the only one that can make me whole. When I miss Matthew, Jesus is waiting to fill that gap in my heart. My relationship with Jesus never, ever has to be long distance and that is the most comforting truth during the hardest season of my life. This time of finding myself and finding Jesus has demonstrated to me how intentional The Lord is in everything He does and how individually He loves me.

This is hard, people. And it does not get easier with time; in fact it's harder to say goodbye to Matthew every time he leaves. But, I have so much clarity that it has been the best thing for the both of us and for our relationship. We have watched each other grow into the man and woman God intended us to be and our relationship is so much stronger than it would have been if we decided to go to the same college. So, if you're reading this and you're missing someone, just know that you are loved for who you are and this can be a season of learning and growth instead of one of sadness and longing. Be patient; the best things in life take time.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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