Many people say young love will never last and teenagers just date to pass time. When you think about it, what really is love? Who can define what we can feel, how to feel, and when we feel? Everyday there is some adult telling you that you can be anything and you can do anything. Why is it such a problem that we love at a young age?
Going through high school I was victim of thinking everything could be love. I had boyfriends one after another and each one I was so sure he could be the one! But soon after it was just another brake up followed by another guy. I don't think I was ever truly happy. I look back now and remember a scared but ambitious little girl who just wanted what others had. I have always looked up to my brother and when he was in relationships, I wanted to be in one also. But stepping back helped me realize that I needed more than a "just for now relationship," I wanted a forever and always relationship.
Coming to Mary Baldwin helped me clear my mind and helped open my eyes to so many things I never thought was possible. I knew I had a thing with women that I never could explain but coming here really opened my eyes. I could be anyone here and I could restart a bit. In October I realized I needed to do what was good for me for a while. I needed to take care of myself in order to find what I was looking for and in just two months I found the person who is now one of the most important person in my life.
One day before classes ended I noticed one of my friends wasn't there later to find out that she just forgot about the class and slept in. I had this strange feeling that I had never felt before. It was concern, sadness, caring, and anxiety all at once. For someone I barely knew I was so worried about her. People in my classes sometimes didn't come but the one class I had with her and looked forward to, she didn't come.
With first semester almost ending and Winter break almost starting, I was really starting to relax knowing I was going home. So relaxed I noticed I hadn't really let my emotions come to me. Then I saw her. I knew I could talk to her but the again it didn't seem like I could. I pushed back these feeling for the past couple of months so why couldn't I now? It was her. It was always her.
We started talking and then I realized without being in a relationship, I was falling in love with her. Winter break came and we started dating. The first thing I wanted to do when I got back was kiss her and tell her I loved her, but I didn't want to wait. So I blew up and told her through message, it wasn't my most romantic point in the relationship. But nine months later we are doing better than ever and more in love than ever. Everyday our love grows more and more and I couldn't be happier. Even though I went through so many relationships I think they helped me truly realized what I wanted in life. I just had to find her.
Happy nine months baby!