Lets face it, finding holiness within your first few days in college is probably the furthest thing from your mind as you shop for items for your dorm. However, as someone who has been on both ends of that college spectrum, I know what it's like to want to try new things and have crazy experiences.One of the first things that I did before I came to college was make a promise to myself. After seeing most of my older friends who were heavily involved in religious things completely fall away from their faith, I made a decision to stay involved no matter what may influence me in college. I knew that the best way to keep the relationship that I had formed with God throughout high school was to surround myself with people who would both challenge me towards holiness and allow me to make right decisions. At the time, it seemed easy for me to make such a promise. However, it was really different for me once I actually got to school. Seeing the way that I was in high school, very involved with youth group and church events, my friends and family took bets on how long it would take for me to “bust out” as they called it. My friends especially all had the impression that we would all become completely different people than in high school, and while that was true. I think what they had in mind was that they would become for lack of a better phrase, “crazy college kids”. Based on the experience I witnessed from my sister and my brother, I didn’t consider it an insane notion. In my mind I thought that if it could happen to my sister, who was the most pious person in high school, it could happen to me. My friends in high school had their expectations of experiences they would have in college, and I had mine. The only difference is that mine would require a significant amount of work.
The most important lesson I learned from my experiences with friends is that it’s important to make friendships that are much deeper than gossiping, getting wasted and partying. I learned that you have to make friends who you can go get breakfast with, cry with, who support your life goals and believe in you. Looking back on the social network I have now, I have to ask myself why I have the friends I have now. The biggest reason for it is that promise that I made to God and to myself. I knew that from the moment I signed up for first year retreat that I would meet the people that would make my college experience a meaningful one. I have friends like Lydia and Anna that both challenge me to be both holy and a better person. We have fun on the weekends without the need for bad decisions. And lastly, they motivate me to try out new things such as the 5k while also allowing to make my own decisions within significant reason. This is so different from the friends I had in high school who supported me whatever decision I made, I learned here that having someone hold you to a higher standard means so much more than just letting someone roam free. They didn’t really challenge me to holiness. I mean that in the sense that yes they were religious but they were the type to sleep in rather than go to church on Sunday. So anytime I talked about the things we were doing in youth group they either didn’t care or they just referred to me as the “nun” of the group. These are the people that I spent most of my time with in high school. We referred to ourselves as the “squad”. And again, I’m not saying that they are awful people. I love them and I would do anything for them. However, for my own college experience, I knew that I would need much more than what my friends in high school provided me because the temptation to make bad decisions was much greater in a college setting. It all comes down to who can hold you accountable for the actions you take. I’m glad for the friends I have now.
The people you have in your life have been placed there for a reason. I firmly believe that the friends that I have now have been placed in my life to help me get close to God, and that’s all I could ever ask for.
As you can see and as you have probably already experienced yourself, it's not easy at all. The temptation is very present and the people you have around you really do make an impact on that. If there is one thing that you guys could take away from this talk is that the people you have in your life now do in fact have an influence on you as a person and the experiences you have. Finding holiness in something as small as your group of friends is perhaps the most important thing within a college setting.
