Sometimes people aren’t lucky enough to find their soulmate until mid-life. Sometimes, people aren’t lucky enough to ever find their soulmate. But, is love actually luck? Is finding the love of your life just like finding a four leaf clover? Do people have many loves in a lifetime or do we only have one true love?

After having this discussion with my roommate and my boyfriend, I’m really not sure how I view love. My roommate was the first to bring up the question of whether or not we have multiple loves. Everyone has their high school loves; hell, some people even grow up to marry them (my parents are my textbook example for that). We talked about maybe even having “levels” of love. Will one confess their love to another if they don’t have a greater love for them than they have had for anyone else in their past? And does love go away? Or do you have love for a person forever?

Regardless of what love is and how one views it, everyone deserves to find themselves someone.

Find yourself someone who motivates you. In life sometimes, especially in college, everyone needs a push. They might need the push to go to class instead of hitting the snooze on their alarm for the third time. They might need the push to get their homework done. They might need the push to go to the library to study. Find yourself someone who will keep you on track. Someone who will motivate you to be your best, to do your best. Someone who will motivate you to be successful and push yourself to your fullest potential.

Find yourself someone who humors you WTFFFFFFFF. No matter who you are, you need to laugh. Everyone needs to laugh. “Laughter is the best medicine.” So, why not find someone who will always have you laughing? Someone who will make sure to pretend to laugh at your lame jokes, especially when you think they aren’t so lame. Find yourself someone who encourages your dreams, no matter how big and unreachable they may seem. Finding someone who believes in you and is willing to help you in reaching every and any one of your dreams is truly the biggest blessing.

Find yourself someone who understands you. It’s common knowledge that sometimes it’s just necessary to cry, eat, sleep or maybe stay up and talk. Find someone who understands this and respects it. Find someone who will be your shoulder to cry on, your personal chef or food runner, your chest to sleep on or your therapist when you just need to talk and someone to listen. Finding someone who understands you along with your wants and your needs is crucial. And it’s rare.

I think the most important thing when finding your person is finding someone who trusts you. Trust is something that is easily lost and not easily gained back. Trust is key. Everyone needs someone who they can trust with their deepest, darkest secrets. If you get burnt once, it’s hard to let your guard down again. No matter what, trust is necessary in any personal relationship or friendship.

My advice for anyone reading this: find yourself someone who gives you not only what you want, but what you need. Find yourself someone who loves you for who you are, and who motivates you every day to be your absolute best.