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Finals Week Survival Guide: The Liz Lemon Edition

It can't be that different from "The Girlie Show," can it?

Kaela A. Coppinger

Nov 28, 2016

Hempstead, New York

Finals Week Survival Guide: The Liz Lemon Edition

Bustle

It has come to be that time of year again... Thanksgiving recess, the end of the Fall term... But wait! What about all that time in-between your definite route to freedom? That's right! You guessed it! ... The most sinister, indefinite, life or death week of your life is the only thing standing between you, vacation, and that perfect GPA.

Welcome folks, to a college student's worst nightmare... Finals Week! But have no fear fellow overachievers... "30 Rock"'s Liz Lemon is here, ready and revving to guide you through all the ups and downs of finals preparation. It can't be that different from "The Girlie Show," can it?

It's been one hell of a busy semester, so you may have neglected to recognize your first final is in mere days... What do you do?

Once you've been debriefed by your EasyMac, it's finally time to crack open that first book... Only to discover not one word of it makes any feasible sense.

So... What happens next?!

No, no no! -- I mean, you could, but, guess where that 4.0 is going to go...

That's right, you better dive back in... That pile of books won't read themselves.

You have no time to lose! It's time to inspire that midnight oil...

Um... Yeah... I suppose that works.

It's 5 a.m. and through much strife and turmoil-- you've managed to ACTUALLY study. Congratulations!!

But, guess who also has a test at 7:30 a.m.? ... YOU! Might as well stay up with all that test anxiety.

Woah, woah, woah! Slow down, slick! It'll all be worth it once you bust through that classroom door, veins pumping caffeine, with a pencil in hand!

And once you bang out that workflow and ace that exam...

GO CRAZY!!

You've earned it!!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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For the entirety of my high school career, I was always seen as the goody-two-shoes. I never got in trouble with a teacher, I kept stellar grades, and when I wasn't doing extracurricular activities, I was at home studying. Even when I did go out, it was usually with a bunch of fellow band geeks. The night would end before 11:00 PM and the only controversial activity would be a fight based on who unfairly won a round of Apples-to-Apples when someone else clearly had a better card (I promise I'm not still holding a grudge).

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Finals Week Survival Guide: The Liz Lemon Edition

It can't be that different from "The Girlie Show," can it?

It's been one hell of a busy semester, so you may have neglected to recognize your first final is in mere days... What do you do?

Once you've been debriefed by your EasyMac, it's finally time to crack open that first book... Only to discover not one word of it makes any feasible sense.

So... What happens next?!

No, no no! -- I mean, you could, but, guess where that 4.0 is going to go...

That's right, you better dive back in... That pile of books won't read themselves.

You have no time to lose! It's time to inspire that midnight oil...

Um... Yeah... I suppose that works.

It's 5 a.m. and through much strife and turmoil-- you've managed to ACTUALLY study. Congratulations!!

But, guess who also has a test at 7:30 a.m.? ... YOU! Might as well stay up with all that test anxiety.

Woah, woah, woah! Slow down, slick! It'll all be worth it once you bust through that classroom door, veins pumping caffeine, with a pencil in hand!

And once you bang out that workflow and ace that exam...

GO CRAZY!!

You've earned it!!

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I'm technically an adult, so I'm legally required to live a little, right?

1. Watch an R-rated Scary Movie in a Movie Theater

2. Buy a Lottery Ticket

3. Vote in an Election

4. Participate in a Run (or a Walk, Realistically) for Charity

5. Go on a Road Trip

6. Start a Savings Account

7. Get a Credit Card

8. Sign up for Spotify Premium

9. Go to a Club

10. Start a Meditation Routine

11. Go to a Yoga Class

12. Treat Myself to a Dinner for One

13. Volunteer for a Charity

14. Participate in a Research Study

15. Bake Something (That Ends Up Being Edible)

16. Go Skydiving

17. Be Called for Jury Duty

18. Figure Out What I Want to Do With my Life

The holiday classics that shaped my life

1."But what would happen if we all tried to be like Santa and learned to give as only he can give: of ourselves, our talents, our love and our hearts? Maybe we could all learn Santa's beautiful lesson and maybe there would finally be peace on Earth and good will toward men."

"Sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see."

"If you won't use your heart, who cares if it gets broken? If you just keep it to yourself, maybe it'll be like my rollerblades. When you do decide to try it, it won't be any good. You should take a chance. Got nothing to lose."

"Remember, no man is a failure who has friends."

"Life is made up of meetings and partings. That is the way of it."

"If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find a that love actually is all around."

"Sometimes things look good on paper, but lose their luster when you see how it affects real folks. I guess a healthy bottom line doesn't mean much if to get it, you have to hurt the ones you depend on."

"'Maybe Christmas,' he thought, 'doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.'"

"Faith is believing when common sense tells you not to."

"There's room for everyone on the nice list."

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

1. Why are towels considered dirty when you get out of the shower clean?

2. Who closes the bus door once the bus driver gets off?

3. Why is there a "d" in "fridge" but not in "refrigerator"?

4. If you drop soap on the floor is the floor clean or the soap dirty?

5. Is the "S" or the "C" silent in the word "scent"?

6. Does expecting the unexpected make the unexpected the expected?

7. Would Lightning McQueen buy car insurance or life insurance?

8. Who put the alphabet in alphabetical order?

9. What color are mirrors?

10. If 2 mind readers read each other's minds whose mind are they really reading?

11. Is there a synonym for "synonym"?

12. If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, are your pants tucked into your shirt?

13. Why is it called "quick sand" if you sink slowly in it?

14. If I try to fail, but succeed, which one did I do?

15. If Cinderella's shoe fit perfectly, why did it fall off?

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

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