1) Life will go on.
The sun will rise again in the morning. Birds will still be singing. Through the pain and the tears, the one thing that will get you through is knowing that this pain isn’t forever. Some day all of the pain will make sense, so just close your eyes, clench your fist, and hold on until that happens.
2) Its ok to laugh.
One of the hardest things for me, especially in the first weeks, was that when something happened that made me want to smile or laugh there was a little voice that came and said “wait no you can’t be happy, you’re sad.” This voice is a liar. When you are going through something like this, take heart in the little moments where you see glimpses of happiness.
3) This is a time to learn to love yourself.
Take up a new hobby (maybe blogging?). Go to the gym, or eat 5 cupcakes, or read a good book, or do whatever it is that makes you love you. Take this time to water your own grass, not noticing if someone else’s is greener than yours.
4) REVENGE.
No no not like that. Don’t slash his tires or burn his clothes. Get your revenge by doing better. Become the best version of yourself, and that will be the best revenge.
5) Forgive.
Nelson Mandela said “We never heal until we forgive.” This couldn’t be more true.
6) Let go.
Do not look at old pictures. Do not dare beg for him back. Don’t drive past his house a million times or go stroll down memory lane. You have to let go of him.
7) DO NOT “WHAT IF?”
“What if I would have…?” “Well if I would of just..” “But Maybe if we had…” NO. NO. NO. None of this is healthy. None of this will help. It is over. Again, Let. It. Go. *Elsa Voice*
8) Know you are enough.
You are enough now. You were enough then. You will continue to be enough. You are always enough. The fact that someone does not see your worth, does not lessen it at all.
9) There will be another “one.”
Maybe this one will really be the one. Maybe he won’t. Maybe there will be ten more “the ones.” Maybe you will meet him tomorrow. Maybe you will meet him ten years from now. The point is, you will love again. Odds are, your best kiss, your best laugh, and your best love are all ahead of you.
10) Move on.
This is last, but most important. Move on, in many ways. Go on a date. Give yourself a break. Take some time to mourn, and then dance. (What doesn’t a dance party help?) You take time, whether that time is a week, a month, or six months, when the time comes, get up, put on some red lipstick, and move on.
