Last weekend I was sitting in my bed with my laptop watching a movie when I noticed a decent sized black bug crawling across the floor. The bug was moving at a quick pace and headed for my refrigerator. I jumped up because I wanted to stop the bug before it was out of sight but I found myself wrapped up in my computer cord. By the time I had freed myself the bug was gone. I quickly grabbed a bunch of napkins and waited patiently for the bug to show itself — even jiggling the refrigerator a bit but nothing emerged. I never did find that bug.

My fear of bugs has definitely gotten better since high school and college, but even so, I did not sleep well the week following the escaped bug. I found myself waking up in the middle of the night thinking that it might be crawling on me. Before I would go to bed I would lift up my pillow and sheets and check that they were free of any insects before jumping in and tucking the sheet tightly up and around my neck.

'Til this day, when I am home I always check all four corners of the ceiling in my bedroom for spiders before going to sleep. Am I a little obsessive? Please tell me I’m not alone!

If I discovered a bug when I was younger, I would call loudly for as long as it took for my parents to come and squish it. I learned the hard way that you should never abandon your post after spotting a bug because they seem to know when you leave and will run and hide not to be found — similar to the bug under my refrigerator situation.

Sometimes, though, when I found myself in the presence of a bug, my parents would be gone and I couldn’t wait long enough for them to come back. In these circumstances I would take a chance by abandon my post and sprinting to the kitchen to grab a glass. Then I would enclose the bug in the glass and happily leave a note on top “please kill.”

I am proud to say that I can now kill my own bugs without the help of my parents or anyone else. Although, I still find it necessary to roll up a large amount of toilet paper even for the smallest of bugs because the feeling of the guts exploding underneath my finger is one of the most unpleasant experiences. If I ever do encounter a bug that looks fat and juicy, I’m afraid I will still need the assistance of a friend to kill it — no amount of toilet paper will be enough.

The thing in particular about bugs that freak me out is that I always feel like they are going to leap at me right as I get close enough to pancake them — it is a stressful experience. And on the few occasions I missed the kill shot with a wad of Kleenexes and the spider fell from the ceiling... Heart attack! I then experienced a double heart attack when I could not find the fallen spider! In instances like these, I spin around in circles ferociously wiping off my clothes and checking my hair — it normally ends in a shower.

One other thing about bugs that gives me the creeps is a spider's ability to dangle on a single line of web attached to the ceiling; I become paralyzed if I almost run into it. Now, I have a mad respect for God’s creativity in the spider's ability to do this however, does it have to happen in front of my face? I've got goosebumps now.