Recently my plans for the coming year have been changing, and with it fear comes bubbling up. The fear of the unknown, wondering if I am making the right decisions. It is crazy that decisions I make now can have a lasting effect on my life. I still feel so young, too young to be making life changing decisions. I am wishing I could have a "decision maker", like Rachel asked Monica to be for her in an episode of Friends, someone wiser who I chose to make all my important decisions for me. Then I realized I kind of do have a helping guide to help me navigate this ever-changing life, the Holy Spirit.
It's hard to trust the little voice inside of your head sometimes, for fear it may not be the voice you think it is. It reminds me of the cartoons with the devil and the angel on each shoulder, you don't want to listen to the wrong voice! A friend and I were discussing this very subject and she told me that following the wrong voice was her biggest fear, and I had to agree with her on that one. With so much uncertainty, I believe that all you can do is pray for guidance and trust and hope that you are following God's will for your life.
So many times throughout the Bible God reminds us to fear not and to not worry, yet that is constantly what I do. I worry about the future, making choices, and what is going to happen, but why? God's got this. God is in control and has a plan for my life. Of course I want to make sure I stay on His path, but I must trust that with His help He will guide me along the right road.
Often times His road is not the safe, comforting road. In most cases, it is the path that will lead you out of your comfort zone. I believe this is the case for me this year, I am having to "step out upon the waters" and trust that I am in the right place with the right people and am walking through the door God has opened for me. Yes I am scared and have had to have many pep talks, but when you pray for an opening and God clearly gives you one, you should definitely go through it. I know many other people going through similar uncertainties, so from one struggling person to another, I know that the coming year may look like a hazy fog now, but I am sure that everything will work out for your best interest.
As said in one of my pep talks, my friend reminded me to look back at this past year. Freshman year, new friends, new relationships, new town, new basically everything and even if not all of it was picture perfect I survived and lived to tell the tale. So much happened and the same is true for this year! So much is going to happen and so many things will change but next year at this time we will be able to look back and say, "Wow, I made it. Everything turned ok and I am stronger than ever." My friend also reminded me that when life throws you a curveball, don't freak out! It may seem like a crisis or a big deal but it may just be God steering you back towards Him and His path for your life. So trust that God is in control and remember fear not and don't worry.