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I Ranked 11 Fast-Food Fries From Worst To Best, And Mickey D's DIDN'T Win

Going from worst to best, here is my controversial opinion on fast food fries, and no McDonald's is not the best.

Gabby Sheets

Feb 19, 2023

Bowling Green State University

21765

I Ranked 11 Fast-Food Fries From Worst To Best, And Mickey D's DIDN'T Win

Five Guys / Instagram

I firmly believe that nobody hates fast food, and the people that say they do are lying. These people do not mean that they hate the taste of the food but the repercussions of eating it, the consequences that one faces with the calorie intake or the intestinal issues lying ahead. Fast food, no matter how disgusting it makes you feel after, is delicious, especially the fries.

So, here is a ranking of the 11 fast food fries entirely based off of my opinion only, hence its controversy. There are some disgusting fries on this list in my opinion.

However, keep in mind that my definition of "disgusting" in this instance is that I would most likely still eat them if they were offered to me.

Steak and Shake (Dishonorable Mention)

Flickr

These thin pieces of cardboard potatoes can't even make it to number 10 on this ranking. One of my roommates loves these fries, and, just like Steak and Shake, she has garbage taste.

10. Burger King

Wikimedia Commons

I don't even know what to write for this one. No one cares, Burger King. You bore me. Next!

9. Dairy Queen

Wikimedia Commons

You go to Dairy Queen for blizzards, milkshakes, sundaes, but NEVER french fries.

8. Rally's

Flickr

These fries looks beautifully seasoned, but in reality they taste mediocre, hence their mediocre ranking.

7. Raising Cane's WITHOUT the sauce

Wikipedia

What. Is. THE POINT?

6. McDonald's

Wikimedia Commons

I am underwhelmed, McDonald's. I always have been. I always will be. You're fine, but I am just not McLovin' it.

5. Raising Cane's WITH the sauce

Wikimedia Commons

YES. Dip the fries in the Cane's sauce. Forget about McDonald's.

4. Chick-Fil-A

Wikimedia Commons

These are delicious and have a fun shape, but I still do not believe they deserve the best spot at slot 10. Come at me.

3. Five Guys

Pixabay

These fries are so greasy and awesome. You can slather them in vinegar, which not everybody loves, but I do! And this is my controversial ranking, so...

2. Wendy's

Wikimedia Commons

These fries taste likes real potatoes. French fries = potatoes. I am sorry, but McDonald's has got nothing on these perfect, fried slices of ACTUAL potato on Wendy's menu.

1. Arby's

Flickr

Beautifully seasoned and beautifully curly... Arby's has the best fries. @ me, I dare you.

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I Ranked 11 Fast-Food Fries From Worst To Best, And Mickey D's DIDN'T Win

Going from worst to best, here is my controversial opinion on fast food fries, and no McDonald's is not the best.

Steak and Shake (Dishonorable Mention)

10. Burger King

9. Dairy Queen

8. Rally's

7. Raising Cane's WITHOUT the sauce

6. McDonald's

5. Raising Cane's WITH the sauce

4. Chick-Fil-A

3. Five Guys

2. Wendy's

1. Arby's

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"I want to thank Google, Wikipedia, and whoever else invented copy and paste. Thank you."

1. I'm so tired. I need a nap. Maybe I can sleep with my eyes open in class? Or pretend I'm not napping?

2. We have a test today? Why didn't anyone tell me? Did I know this?!

3. Can I quit school yet? It's only October, and I need a vacation.

4. The struggle is so real.

5. I'm so broke. SOS.

6. Stressed? Eat everything you own in your pantry and stuff your face with all your feelings.

7. "Did we have anything due in class today? Homework? Quiz? Test?" "Not that I know of..."

8. I need food. Where is the closest place to get food? I need it stat.

9. This is the longest day of my life. I need a drink, or two, or three.

10. Sleep? What is sleep? What a foreign concept.

11. When someone suggests going and studying in the library, let alone studying in general.

12. When the cafeteria or student center is packed and you can't find a seat anywhere so you literally have to sit in an abandoned corner.

13. When you see someone you used to hook up with. They see you, and approach you; so you have to pretend like everything is normal.

14. When you get your exam and realize you didn't study as much as you should have.

15. When you crush it on an exam or paper that you totally bullshitted.

16. I need a grande, extra strong coffee to get me through today.

17. When the professor announces you have a project due the following week with no instruction on what it's on and how to do it.

18. Is it Friday yet? Where's the weekend when you need it most?

19. It's freezing in here. I feel like I'm sitting in an igloo. I should have brought a jacket or worn long pants.

20. Did I remember my book? Damn, I forgot the book, and of course I need it for that quiz in class.

21. I would pay a million dollars to not go to class today; or actually never again.

22. I need a hoverboard to ride to class. Maybe then I wouldn't be running 15 minutes late to class every day.

23. Oh she/he's cute! I wonder if they're single. Who are they texting? They're BF/GF? I wonder if they think I'm cute. Could they be a potential new bae?

24. Why is there never any parking? I pay thousands of dollars a year for one parking spot to be open.

25. When it feels like you've been in class for an hour and you look at your phone and it has only been five minutes (I'm crying on the inside).

26. When the professor asks if there are any more questions at the end of class and someone raises their hand.

27. When you get assigned the most incompetent group of people possible for a group project.

28. I need a comfort dog so I can avoid all life and school responsibilities.

"A Christmas Story" is the star on top of the tree.

Who isn't stressing out over finals right now?

'tis the season to be jolly!

May the odds be ever in your favor.

Phase One: The “I got this” phase

Phase Two: The “I have time” phase

Phase Three: The uncontrollable sobbing phase

Phase Four: The “help me, I've fallen and I can't get up” phase

Phase Five: The rejoicing phase

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