When Your Family And Friends Hate Your Partner, Listen To Them | The Odyssey Online
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relationships

If Your Friends And Family Hate Your Partner, They Probably Have A Good Reason To

He often talks about her as if she's a sexual object, and to make matters worse, jokes about making decisions for her regarding her body.

2017
Ariana and Pete at the VMAs

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I've been hearing a lot of talk about Pete Davidson and Ariana Grande. Hearing of their engagement was a shock — to me and most of the world. They'd only been dating for a month before announcing their engagement; and to make matters worse, they entered into a partnership almost immediately after Ariana's split with Mac Miller.

Without knowing anything about the two celebrities, their relationship is already looking problematic.

There are three dating sins that should never be committed, two of which Grande has already done. These dating habits are just plain bad, and they almost end in heartbreak.

I don't claim to be a relationship guru, nor do I get a thrill out of dragging celebrity unions, but analyzing celebrity relationships allows us to make connections in our own personal relationships. People can learn a lot by studying Davidson and Grande's relationship, and not necessarily about its rocky start. Despite the three dating sins listed above, the most problematic aspect of the union so far is how it is being perceived by those who care a great deal about her... her fans.

Fans have a weird relationship with their idols (and vice versa). It's a relationship filled with love and (sometimes a bit obsessive) adoration, despite the two parties not knowing each other personally. Sometimes, these fans know more about celebrities than the famous people know about themselves — and sometimes, they can spot a sinking ship before a celebrity has even realized that it left the harbor.

Since their engagement announcement, Arianators have been quite vocal about their abhorrence of Davidson.

Sure, we can write off their complaints as them still being bitter about the Grande/Miller split, but if that is the case, why didn't people bash Mac Miller after Ariana split with Big Sean? Sure, we can write off Pete's comments as a reflection of his comedic nature and style of "dark humor," but I have to admit that a lot of the things he says are problematic. He often talks about her as if she's a sexual object, and to make matters worse, jokes about making decisions for her regarding her body (who thinks its funny to switch someone's birth control pills?). What makes this situation even more peculiar is that Ariana Grande is a fervent feminist. She's always been vocal about women's rights and women's issues. So why hasn't she checked her fiance about his toxic behavior?

Perhaps love really is blind.

Grande's ignorance of Pete's problematic actions echoes a larger problem in dating. How we are so reluctant to actually listen when those who care about our well-being say something negative about our partners? Perhaps if we were more reticent, we would save ourselves from heartache.

Not only that, but Davidson and Grande's relationship might echo an even large problem when it comes to dating: abuse.

From the outside looking in, I am in no way, shape, or form qualified to suggest that Pete Davidson is an abusive partner, but there are thousands of men and women in the world who are. Their lack of respect for their partners and controlling behavior can cause significant emotional and physical trauma. And since October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, it's important that we're mindful of the dating choices we're making, and the choices that our loved ones are making. We need to have more open discussions about these topics, because abuse comes in many shapes and forms, and it's important that we're able to spot them early on.

I like Ariana Grande. And I think Pete Davidson is a pretty funny guy (when he's not being problematic). But I have to admit that their relationship gives off warning bells. Ladies and gentlemen, if everyone around you is saying your partner is trash, they probably are.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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