Ever since what feels like the dawn of time, I have had family member after family member give me their two cents on their views of the potential body mods I one day wish to make a reality, They go down one by one like an assembly line of insults piling onto my chest negativity like bricks, crushing me on the inside and weakening my spirits little-by-little because the people I love will stop loving me if I express my individuality.
Even though I am officially an 18-year-old, I am still treated like a child who is too naive to the world to make any decisions of her own. Hearing from mine and the families of my friends that they will take them out of wills or pull them from college or kick them out of their households just for being the proud owner of an eyebrow ring or chest tattoo.
As I have stated, I am 18 years of age. That means that I no longer need the permission of a parent or guardian to get a tattoo or piercing in these United States. I have garnered a new sense of independence since August 13th, 2016; the right to decorate my body as I please. Even with the law on my side, almost every family member I have has scolded me at dinner tables or made me feel shameful over something so trivial as a tattoo. I understand that they only want the best for me, but it certainly doesn't always feel that way.
To a lot people who have them, the tattoos on their skin or piercings through their body are more than just pictures and holes; they are symbols of individuality. Symbols of strength, tools to aid them in feeling more comfortable in their own skin. Even though as of now, my body is bare, I know in my heart that the results of body modification would yield the same results. It's an opinion I've had since I was 11, and it's an opinion I don't plan on changing any time soon.
That's just it. These are my opinions. The words I type are the quintessential definition of subjectivity. I don't run around judging people who don't have tattoos or piercings or calling them names or making snap judgments against them because they don't think like I do. I respect their choices for their own body and move on with my day. A practice I feel should be adopted by more people. Especially when the people you're judging are your own flesh and blood.
This article is more than just an angsty rant: this is an open letter to not just mine, but to all families potentially lowering the self esteem of their loved ones over the debate of how one should design their body. I understand that my family wants nothing more than for me to succeed, I have zero doubts about that. As a certified introvert and being known to avoid arguments as much as possible, I decided to utilize the powers of the interwebs to make my case.
So, dear family: it's Amber. As a brand spankin' new adult, I now have certain liberties that I once never owned. I was respectful enough to not go behind anyone's back and get the body mods I wanted without your permission. Now that I am 18 years of age, I have made the calculated decision of collecting tattoos and body jewelry, I am well aware of your stance on this situation. I do not ask you to change it. All I request is that you keep it to yourselves. Heck, talk about it behind my back if you want. I just don't want to know about it. Please respect me and not undermine me for who I am. Even if these things end up being a huge mistake (which is highly unlikely), it is my mistake to make. Let me suffer the consequences in that instance. I love each and every one of you, but no one wants to feel so small that they fear voicing their views on themselves because of the inevitable discrimination. In the words of one of my personal idols, tattoo artist extraordinaire Kat Von D, “I am a canvas of my experiences, my story is etched in lines and shading, and you can read it on my arms, my legs, my shoulders, and my stomach.”
Body mods are more than what they appear. They are pieces of art and stories the canvas chooses to present into the world. If you don't like it, stay away from our museums.
