Dating can feel like the big drop on a rollercoaster. You make steady progress to the top, and then all of a sudden your feelings are uncontrollable and you're screaming at the top of your lungs. It can feel so overwhelming and it's possible to get wrapped up into someone after only knowing them for a short period of time. I have done this so often in the past that I was trying not to let it happen again. Well, here we are, and I think I've lost my voice from screaming so loudly.
I have gone on amazing dates with this person and always have the best time when I am with him. I feel like I can never get enough of being around him. I have never felt like I needed to hold back anything for fear of it being "too soon" or "too awkward" to talk about. Thankfully, he reciprocates these feelings.
We immediately started hanging out at every free chance. I honestly haven't felt this way about someone in a while. The only way I can describe it is as if I'm falling in love like I'm in high school again. However, this time, I know what I should be looking for, and this guy is worth falling for.
The only problem is that I'm scared to fall in love with someone so quickly again.
As a person that easily opens up, it can be kinda depressing when things don't work out. I have often found myself telling someone my whole life story, all for it to end with us as Snapchat friends. I was cautious at first with this new love. I thought maybe it might be lust, but the reality is that it doesn't seem like it's ending anytime soon. I mean, will I ever know if I don't put all my cards on the table? I'd miss out on a great opportunity to get to know a really great guy. I would be missing out on all the times I almost peed my pants from laughing so hard or the magical feeling of holding someone's hand for one of the first times in public.
These moments might last or they might not, but I'll never know if I don't give it a chance.
He and I recently talked about the "L" word - abstractly not using the real word of course. It wasn't like a, " I'm not sure if I 'L' you or not" it was more of an "I 'L' you, but I don't know if it's the right time to say it." It got me wondering if we were waiting to say it because of a preconceived notion of how long you should be with someone before you say you love them. It made me wonder if I really knew what it meant to love someone anyway. Can I be in love with someone but still have so much more to learn about them? I think so, but there is no clear-cut answer.
Getting back to actually saying the word. I think him and I should maybe just say it. We should just dive right in. If we both feel it, and we know we both feel it, then who are we kidding ourselves by not having said it already.
I hope everyone who is feeling something for someone has the courage to tell them. I hope that the risk of exposing yourself yields you a great reward. It can feel terrifying but I promise you that the butterflies in your stomach prove it's worth it.