To really be a feminist, you must 110 percent support all races, all genders, all identities, all body types, all abilities and all people. If your “feminism” isn’t intersectional, it isn’t feminism. I personally pride myself on adhering to the true message of intersectional feminism, and I believe that inclusivity is vital in all aspects of the movement.
Something that plays a key role in my life is the body positive movement. Throughout my years, I have struggled with my weight and body image, and I feel like the message behind body positivity is beautiful. But lately, I’ve been noticing some things that have made me very uncomfortable and honestly, pretty angry coming from certain people claiming to be here for all body types.
If someone says, “I’m fat,” why is it your first instinct to disagree with them?
We get told, “No, you’re beautiful!” and “Real men love curves like yours!”
But the thing is, I never said I wasn’t beautiful. I never said I wanted to change how I looked, or that I was unhappy or uncomfortable. So why do people instantly try to invalidate my thoughts about my body? (Also PS- don’t fetishize someone’s body type to make them feel better. We don’t care what men like. We don’t live our lives to please them!)
I don’t need anyone to tell me that I’m not fat because you know what, I am. I’m fat, and that’s OK. This is my body type, and it’s how I was born.
I am beautiful, despite being fat. I’m fat AND I am beautiful. I’m learning how to love and accept my body, and saying things like that are counterproductive. How can you honestly say that you’re body positive and support self-acceptance across the board when you still perpetuate irrational beauty ideals?
Some people are fat. Get over it. You don’t have to tell us we’re fat, because we know our bodies. You don’t have to attempt to convince us we aren’t fat, because we know our bodies. Some of us have cellulite, big bellies, flat butts or small chests. Just because we’re fat doesn’t mean we’re all the same though, because we’re still individual people. Just respect us and treat us as such.
People come in all shapes, sizes, abilities, colors, identities, etc. And we aren’t all going to be thin. We won’t all be “thick in the right places,” with hourglass body shapes we see left and right in Hollywood. Not everyone has big breasts, round butts, and flat stomachs. Some people are born thin, some fat, some short, some tall. Our differences make us who we are, and there is no incorrect way to be ourselves.
There is no right or wrong way to have a body, but there are right and wrong things to say to someone in regards to their body. Don’t be one of those people that makes people feel as though they need to alter their natural shape to be “normal,” as if their figure is something to be ashamed of.
You aren’t a feminist if you only support the fat people you feel are acceptable. If you can’t look at someone in the eyes and tell them their body is nothing to be ashamed of, whether they weigh 100 or 400 pounds, you don’t have a place in this movement.
Let fat people be fat, let us love ourselves and support us unconditionally. If you can’t do that, you don’t support inclusivity or body positivity.