Failure. You can turn a blind eye, you can act like it’s not right there staring you directly in the face or whispering in your ear. Constantly, you are reminded of how you, dropped the ball, or couldn’t perform to expectations.
Believe it or not, these are the everyday thoughts for many of us.
Just like you, I too have dealt with failure…and a lot of it. I always tell myself, “It’s okay, if it wasn’t for this slip up I would have never truly learned what I did wrong and why.” Maybe it sounds like I am in denial by telling myself positive things. Maybe it’s just me pushing the inevitable further and further away.
A moment of clarity
And then it just happened – like falling in love… it clicked. All it took was one moment of full clarity. My ongoing struggle of continuously hitting walls, obstacles and errors opened the doorway to a deeper understanding; constantly getting smacked with the sweet reminder of failure forced me to shift my perspective into a different lens.
If you haven’t noticed it yet, each time you mess up, you feel one of two things: a little more experienced or a little bit more defeated. After numerous times of choosing to feel defeated, I had an epiphany. This entire time I have been making the conscious decision to dwell in disappointment. I don't know if it was all the self-development books I have been reading or the motivational speakers that I follow, but something changed.
The keyword I'm trying to bring attention to here is conscious. Becoming aware of your thoughts and understanding that you do have the power to take the negative experiences and transform them into positive ones is a life changer.
The perspective begins to shift
Entrepreneurism – or all of your life for that matter – is accompanied by failure and success. Both paths working in tandem, constantly switching priority – but, here's the key: By taking a step forward, it allows you to, at the same time, take a step back and view your thoughts from the outside in. Each time you decide to break down or give up... completely remove any negative words from your thoughts and simply ask yourself these questions:
- Is there anything that I can learn from this?
- What can I learn from this situation? (this is the most important one)
- Are there any skills that I can acquire to accomplish this?
By doing this, you will notice a few things. The negativity will begin to slowly dissipate from your mind as you focus more on a solution and next steps. You will begin to realize you dohave control over your thoughts and the power to control how you view them. "Trust Me, I never Lose; I either win or learn!”
Failure soon becomes a “rite of passage,” Before you know it, you are tackling and dominating any failure that comes in your way. You will soon understand failure isn’t a losing opportunity – it’s actually an opportunity for growth!
I can see clearly now, the failure's gone
Feelings of being scared turned to optimism, uncertainty became confidence, and the ability to take failure head-on... shining greater than ever. I understood failure is like the Ying to the yang to a balanced progressive lifestyle. People like Albert Einstein and the Wright Brothers failed thousands of times before reaching success.
Think of the aspiring real estate agent who failed a test for their real estate license but then went on to pass the second time… or the airline employee studying night and day to pass a robust test given by the FFA or even a car accident lawyer struggling with the most difficult client yet. They all have persevered through emotional waves of self-doubt, failure, and low confidence – in reality, we all have.
Remember, continue taking small steps towards your goals, whatever they may be. This will prevent you from getting overwhelmed by the bigger picture. Taking an introspective step back when it comes to tackling failure only propels you forward that much closer to your final goal – not to mention the irreplaceable skills and experience you will pick up along the way.
All in all, the ultimate decision is made up within the first few seconds of how you take and make a situation. Next time when you are faced with an unparalleled foe and your first strike misses…step back, train and try again. I guarantee the second time you will land a hit.