1. Eat healthier

The first week, you're going strong. By week 2, you're already a pint of ice cream and entire pizza deep into failure. There's always next year!

2. Save your money

Well, that pint and pizza didn't buy itself.

3. Get into a skincare routine

January 1-10: You're washing your face with a 4-part skincare routine. You're washing your makeup off nightly. Your skin is glowing.

January 11: Fall asleep with all of your makeup on

January 12-December 31: Never use your skincare routine again.

4. Quit drinking

Yeah, we all know as soon as you return to your college campus and see your first 4-page syllabus you're going to fail at this one.

5. Get your stuff organized

You've bought the folders. You're ready to color code. After your first week of classes, you've already thrown 3 pieces of paper on the bottom of your bag and it will crumple for eternity.

6. Spend more time in the library

It's so easy to promise yourself a weekly study session to catch up on life when you're not in the midst of school, don't be so hard on yourself.

7. Don't procrastinate as much

Don't worry, by Friday of week 1 you'll be submitting that assignment at 11:55 under extreme stress.

8. Travel more

Sure, you can count your spring break trip to Panama City Beach.

9. Sleep better

End of 2017: 8 hours of sleep is so plausible!

Beginning of 2018: Sure, 3.5 will do.

10. Use social media less

Twitter has honestly hit its prime recently, it was silly to make this resolution to start out with.

11. Clean out your closet

If moving stuff around for the new shit you buy throughout the year counts, sure.

12. Drink more water

It seems like getting 8 cups a water a day is so possible with your brand new water bottle until you fill it with vodka one night and it never smells the same again. Goodbye, goals.

13. Manage stress better

This isn't a very specific goal so hey, you can just say that you crushed it at the end of the year if you cry in one less university bathroom!

14. Learn something new every day

The only thing you're learning is that you suck at New Year's Resolutions, am I right?

15. Read more, watch less

*Has already binged an entire Netflix series by mid-January*

16. Journal every day

It'll be so fun to reread this in 2019 when you finish your journaling endeavors on January 17th.

17. Hit the gym daily

Bad goal to make when its -16 degrees daily and the gym is all the way across campus. Good try!

18. Live life to the fullest

Well, you can't really measure this one so just do your best, homie.