There's nothing worse than a heartbreak, except there is-a heartbreak caused by the end of a friendship. Yet, each friendship heartbreak I went through as hard as it was, helped me to grow as an individual and person. I learned that I can't always trust those closest to me, and everyone can change even myself. Despite the pain and loss that my ex friends caused me, it forced me to grow as an individual.
I learned the importance of growing from my experiences of times where old friends had hurt me, drifted away, and left me seemingly alone. At first with all of these instances, I allowed my hurt and anger to give in to those that I felt had mistreated me. Rather than taking a deep breath, and moving on, I allowed myself to continually seek closure that I would never truly receive from my old friends.
I found that dwelling on those that I felt had wronged me wasn't beneficial, and instead held me back. I realized that I needed to move on and instead learn from all of my ended friendships. I found that by taking time to reflect helped me flourish to become a better human and friend. I then began to invite individuals into my life that truly cared about me, and overall turned my failed friendships into a learning experience.
How failed friendships truly helped me grow:
Accepting That Not All Friendships Last Forever
Failed friendships caused me to accept that those in my life right now, might not always be in my life forever. I learned the importance of accepting that sometimes people have to part ways and that's OKAY! I learned to live in the moment, savor good memories, and not focus on what could or could not be in the future, as the future is completely out of my control. Learning to love the memories I had shared with old friends was okay, even if they wronged me. I allowed myself to smile and reminice about happy times I once had with them. I ultimately found that accepting that an individual was no longer in my life was hard, but I learned I could grow from the bad experiences I had with them as well as the good.
Choosing To Surround Myself With Positive People
I learned that who I surrounded yourself with had a huge influence on who I was as a person, and being around negative individuals influenced me immensely. I constantly felt that I had to change myself to please my old friends, and not be me. I wondered why I felt so angry and rejected by those I had worked so hard to please. Then it hit me, I finally began asking myself "why was I trying so hard?" I registered then that friends shouldn't make one feel like they need to change, they should embrace and love their friends for who they are!
Reflecting On Those Who I Let Into My Life
My failed friendships forced me to reflect on myself and those that I chose to surround myself with. In my case, my ended friendships were a result of me choosing to be friends with individuals for the wrong reasons. I didn't broaden my horizons and let others in, I chose girls that didn't build me up but brought me down. Reflecting on ended friendships helped me to realize how I needed to allow different types of people in, versus choosing to be friends with the same types of individuals.
As hard as it was and still is for me to lose friends, every heartbreak I experienced from those losses helped me to grow throughout all that hurt. I found meaning in my pain and a way to grow to benefit myself rather than dwell on a past that I cannot control. Friendships may not last forever, and I've finally come to accept that that is okay.
