How often have you said to yourself, or others, that you have anxiety, depression, trust issues, or any other struggle that dulls you from being your full self?
I don't want to undermine the seriousness of mental illness or any other issues, and of course I'm no expert, speaking solely from experience. But what if I told you, that words might have something to do with the perpetuity of these conditions? What if I told you, that the way you tell yourself these things may just have a little to do with how you feel?
The word "have" is defined as "to own or posses", thus when we say we have trust issues or depression or an eating disorder or whatever, we are owning it. We are owning it like a new pair of shoes. Despite how detrimental we know these things are to us, with our words, we posses them.
But I think using "have" is giving our struggles too much credit. It's like saying that you, and all your individual gifts and beauties, are possessed by this problem or illness. It's giving it power and saying it's an internal part of who you are. And although I don't think it's anyone's intention to empower the thing that hurts them, when we continuously tell ourselves these stories, subconsciously, it does.
I'm also not trying to say that we should just ignore these problems and act like they don't exist. Instead, I think it's important to shift our vocabulary and our mindset. Instead of saying "I have anxiety", maybe just remember you're justexperiencing anxiety. It's temporary and fleeting and not a part of who you are as a person. I think the focus should be on recognizing that you are just feeling a feeling.
Instead of saying you have an "eating disorder" (or whatever), maybe just realize that you're going through problems with food. I think saying things this way helps you see the hope in the situation. Remembering that you are just feeling this temporary condition allows you to break free from the thought that you'll forever be trapped in it.
Although it may seem like such a tiny little thing, I think recognizing your experiences as experiences, and nothing else, allows you to realize that they don't have to control you or your life.
Of course shifting the way you say things isn't going to be a cure-all. The problems still exist, but I think in the messiness of it all, this is something to keep in mind. In the billions of things that might be horrible about whatever your going through, I think there's no hurt in throwing out one idea that could help.
So shift your words and recognize your feelings as feelings alone. It might shift your mind, and just maybe, shift your life.
