As a child, when I imagined what my life would be like in my early 20s, I imagined myself already a homeowner, engaged to be married at least, and in a solid, salary earning career. Let’s fast forward to today. Do I own a home? Nope. Am I engaged? Not at all. Do I have a solid career? I love my job, but it’s not salary earning.

My parents got married when my mom was 22 and had me at 23. As you could imagine, it set a precedence for me to believe that people start their families and lives at a relatively young age. Now that I’m at that age, I can’t help but wonder why it feels like my life hasn’t started yet.

Recently, my coworkers and I got on the topic of how far behind we feel. But if we really think about it, things have changed a lot since our parents were our age. People stay home with their parents longer than they used to and there is nothing wrong with that. I hate when people say “When I was your age, I was living on my own and working the same full time job that I’ve had for 40 years.” While that is fantastic, time’s have absolutely changed.

More people further their education now than ever before. In addition to that, college is incredibly expensive. The highest level of education required is increasing by the decade. Years ago, most people went straight into the workforce after high school. Later on, having an associates degree was impressive. However, in today’s society, you’re much better off with a Master’s degree in order to get the job you want.

To me, it feels like every time I log onto any of my social media accounts I am bombarded with pictures of childhood friends getting engaged, married, or having a child. It has taken me a very long time to accept that I am just not there yet and that is okay! I would love to feel like my life is moving in a positive direction and to be honest, it still is. You do not have to be on the exact same page with others your age in order to feel like you’re accomplishing something significant.

Recently, I had a discussion with an old roommate because we both are feeling so stuck in our current situations. She honestly helped me put it all into perspective because not everyone’s accomplishments all look the same to outsiders. While we see someone who got a great job in their field of study, we can’t compare where we are to them. She also made the point that I moved to Florida for an internship and found my soul mate. It’s not a career building move, but it’s important in taking new steps in life.

It is very easy to feel discouraged when you aren’t advancing in life as quickly as you had hoped, but it’s important to remember that you will get there when you need to. Don’t rush through life trying to just get to the next step. When we were younger and our parents told us not to wish our lives away, they were right because they’ve already been through it. Be patient. Life will happen when it needs to.