Isaiah 6:8
And I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?" Then I said, "Here am I! Send me."
God sent the people of ENC to me when I was at my lowest point, and they will continue to do so for others.
Here's a quick rendition of my downward spiral as a college student:
As a freshman, I had to take classes I absolutely hated (drawing, design, art history), and I had no one to help me get through it. My freshman year I was a loner and was sad most of the time. I had the occasional bad experience with boys, but no real girl friends.
I started researching local churches and campus ministries to find a group I would like and could fit into and find friends. Unfortunately, nothing stuck.
My sophomore year I had set out to study abroad like I told myself I was going to do since middle school. Living in Europe for three months was the best thing to ever have happened to me, but when I had to come back to the states, I was devastated. I barely had any friends because of the fact I was a loner my freshman year, and I didn't enjoy my major.
To fill the void in my life I downloaded Tinder and met many guys who did nothing but lower my already crashing self-esteem.
Flash forward to junior year, and I would overthink all the time about my future. I would worry I wouldn't be happy and that I was going to college for something I would not end up using. By this point, I hated myself. I felt fat, I felt unloved, I had no confidence, and I was a mess. I was at my lowest point, thinking about killing myself (I would never go through with it), and how life had no real meaning.
I was dying to know my purpose in life and what I was going to do after college or else I had no reason for living. I would read as many examples of self-love books I could find. It was also at this point in my life when a girl invited me to an ENC meeting over the summer at Greenville Christian Church. I didn't know it at the time, but accepting the invitation changed my heart and perception of life for the better.
Summer 2017 was the first time I attended an ENC ministry event. ENC, or Every Nation Campus, exist around the world. I remember standing in the middle of the crowd while worship music played and seeing all these college students around me with their eyes closed and hands in the air genuinely singing to the good Lord above. It was amazing. I thought to myself, "ECU is a party school," "There are people my age that love God this much?" "I thought only older people still went to church."
I had no idea there was an entire group of people around my age that were totally in love with the Lord. It was unbelievable. Every other campus ministry I went to wasn't invested in God as much as they should have been. They were more interested in growing their audience rather than growing true disciples. At ENC, everyone is so nice to each other and has their back.
Everyone would speak to me like they were truly interested in my life (because they are). Everyone would invite me to events, to hang out, to study the Bible with them. It made me feel wanted. I had been looking for a good church to attend, and by golly, I found one.
The most important think about Every Nation Campus is everyone seemed happy.
Fall Retreat with the girls who got me where I am today
ENC hosts conferences and retreats nationwide throughout the year. During the Fall semester, ENC hosts a trip to Virginia at a camp in the middle of basically nowhere. You spend a weekend getaway surrounded by nature kayaking, paddleboarding, sitting around a fire, swimming, journaling, worshipping, and learning about God's purpose for you.
If there is one thing about me you should know, it is I am in love with nature. Nature is calming, peaceful, and the perfect getaway. During the fall trip, there are seminars everyone attends. The seminar I attended just so happened to talk about loneliness and community. What I learned on this trip really spoke to me and the things that were said were too big to be considered a "coincidence".
With the support of those around me and a new group of friends (some from NC State and Duke), I finally had a sense of hope. I saw a way out of the darkness and into the light through the Bible, through Jesus, and through everyone involved in ENC.
No matter what you're going through, be open-minded and seek positivity and help from others. Step out of your comfort zone because it may end up being the one thing that changes your life in the best way.
