Guys make the best friends. Not only is there far less drama than being friends with a girl, but it’s an incredibly close bond. I relate this bond to a father-daughter or mother-son relationship. You can get the raw truth you're looking for in life, instead of the same, “oh, that shirt doesn’t make you look fat”, when it clearly does.
I met my best friend when we were in the 1st grade together, although we weren’t extremely close then. At that age, 20 years ago, girls were mainly friends with other girls and boys were friends with other boys. I blame the cootie epidemic.
Over time, he became one of the people I gravitated to, the person I confided in, and annoyed endlessly, although I don’t think he was one to mind too much. We attended school together until college, and he was the one who looked after me every day, like an older brother. He would make sure I was doing well in my studies and that I wasn’t doing illegal activity (you can thank him later, Mom), and he would tell me which guys he thought I should stay away from.
He knows everything about me, my whole demeanor, my actions before I make them, and the meaning of my different glaring looks. I’m thoroughly convinced that he’s a mind-reader.
We may have argued a handful of times in our younger years, but I’ll always love him and expect us to pick things up where they left off, including being called:
"Dweeb" used to bother me, but in some countries they consider it a term of endearment (I'm totally making that up).
To further my point of why every girl should have a male best friend, I included a list of 20 conversation-starters I say to my best friend:
1. “I need your help”
I've learned to realize that I need a ton of help. Who's the best person to ask (and possibly bother) with my endless questions? My best friend, of course.
2. “I fucked up,” or "I have to tell you something, but don't get mad."
These words I've said to my best friend more times than I'd like to admit, because of stupid decisions - but if he can't fix the problem I bestowed upon myself, at least he can make me feel better about it...or tell me the god honest truth (which is often exactly what I needed).
3. ”When can I see you again?” or “My mom asked how you've been. That means you have to come over soon.”
It seems like sometimes, in our friendship, we have taken brief hiatuses from each other, mainly because of school, work, or adult activities which take precedence - but you know it's time to get together and catch up when my mom brings it up.
4. ”Did you watch The Walking Dead yet?”
The time when The Walking Dead is airing is a very important time for our friendship. If one of us hasn't seen the show when it's first aired (which is very rare), we urge the other to watch is as soon as possible so that we can talk about it...or just talk about how annoying (and detrimental to the group's safety) Carl is.
5.”When can we binge watch Bob’s Burgers again,” leading to “Which Bob’s Burgers character are we?”
Bob's Burgers might just be the most exciting part of my life right now (I'm only somewhat kidding), and when your best friend loves your favorite show as much as you do, you know you've found your BFF (my best friend is Gene when he impersonates Bob, and I'm Louise).
6. ”Boys are idiots.”
He's been known to plead the 5th on this one, and point out a specific boy who is an idiot (mainly the one that made me say this in the first place).
7. ”What do you think would happen if we dated?”
We would have even more time to annoy each other? This is a serious question that comes up from time to time, from either of us, just because it's fun to think how different our lives would be today.
8. “Is it illegal to _____?” or "I need help with my Criminal Justice class. You know Law shit," or "Explain this Law to me, I need to write about it for class."
My best friend graduated with a degree in Criminal Justice and now works for the township, so he tends to know most of the laws, and I have a tendency of wanting to break them (I'm just being cautious, I swear).
9. ”My mom likes you more than me.”
Growing up, your mom can seem like the devil at times, while your friends think she is an angel that God bestowed upon us. Moms ground you and yell at you, but when your friend is over, they're the kindest creatures. Many times I thought my mom liked my best friend more than me, and then realized she's stuck with me, not my best friend.
10. ”You have to say hi to my cat when you come over or we’re not best friends anymore.”
My best friend is allergic to cats, so I feel somewhat bad for this one. But legit, we ain't homies if you don't jive with my baby Coco.
11. Did you hear what happened to _____ from school?
The people we went to school with went on many different paths in life, some for better and some for worse. It tends to be a huge shock upon first hearing of the paths our peers are going down.
12.”Can I come over?”
Sometimes you're just bored and want to be bored with your best friend.
13. ”Want to see this cute picture of my cat? No? Okay good, I’m sending it anyway."
An animal's owner is usually the only person who thinks their animal is flawless, in looks and personality. Totally guilty - and I know my best friend doesn't care about a picture of my animals, but I will send them anyway.
14. ”I have to tell you what he said to me!” or “How should I respond to this text?”
As I send a screenshot of our conversation. Sometimes it's an absurd remark or a cute text, sometimes a man-freak-out or a rude text, all of which baffle me. It's nice to get a guy's perspective on how to respond, especially when I'm not even sure what's being said.
15. ”We didn’t learn anything in school. College sucks.”
Because of bad middle and high school teachers, horrible lesson plans, and only a little because of our ignorance and not paying attention. This is the excuse we say when college work starts becoming painful.
16. ”Remember when you flooded my toilet and I took the blame?”
Yeah, this actually happened. My parents totally thought I took a mondo dook and overflowed their toilet. You're welcome.
17. ”How hot is Ruby Rose?”
There is something special about a badass girl with tattoos, and since she has over 11 million followers on Instagram, I'll say the majority of the world thinks she's the bees knees also.
18. ”Can we go play arcade games and be children?”
I love old-school arcade games, so finding a hall near me that has all old arcade games that you can play for one flat price was a godsend.
19. ”I need best friend talk time!”
Lets face it, everyone needs someone to vent to, and sometimes a girl needs to talk. In this instance, I catch my best friend up on everything that has happened since I last saw him. He's very good at listening and pretending like he cares, even when my rants are incredibly boring.
20. ”I need help with this article about being best friends.”
Because I knew he would always have my back.
I hope you have the pleasure of calling a guy your best friend one day too.
