A few days ago, I caught myself daydreaming about all of the fabulous things I hope to see in my future. I thought of what it'd be like when I finally graduate from college, hopefully with a high GPA (one that I busted my ass for) and thousands of beautiful memories to follow me on my way into the "real" world. I imagined what my dream apartment might look like, complete with hardwood floors, lots of big windows, and a bouquet of fresh flowers in every room. I thought about expensive lingerie underneath designer clothing, a career that I never want a vacation from, and a life that I built by myself, for myself. I dreamt of every desire I've ever had finally coming together in the picture perfect world I've always wanted; a world where one day, everything is alright.
But with all of these longterm goals comes an overwhelming sense of responsibility. Like thousands of other college students all over the world, I feel an astounding amount of pressure to become something special once I earn my degree– to do something of significant importance. It's an overachieving mindset, the thought that if you're not pushing yourself beyond your limits every second of every day, you might not succeed. It's the outlook that I've based my education on thus far, and that competes with my perfectionist mindset on a daily basis.
There are days when I question whether or not I'm working hard enough, and if I could be pushing myself one step further– because maybe if I'd spent ten extra minutes on that assignment, I would've gotten a 100% instead of 89%. Maybe I should've picked up the extra shift at work instead of enjoying my one day off. Maybe if I joined that club, it wouldn'thave thrown off my already over-scheduled week. Maybe, maybe, maybe. Should've, could've, would've.
I've always been my own toughest critic. I have a tendency to obsess, analyze and overthink my work until I convince myself it was never good enough to begin with. But recently, I've been trying my best to recognize when I'm being irrational and to think more realistically. Whenever critical, unfair thoughts cross my mind, I counteract them with something that I know is more honest. I'm taking courses that challenge me at an incredible school, I'm completing multiple internships, I'm holding down a steady job that I enjoy, and truthfully, everything is alright.
If there's one piece of advice that I think all students can benefit from, it's that you shouldn't waste your time waiting for things to be perfect. Success doesn't happen over night, and things take time to grow. Instead of dwelling on one bad grade, use the dozens of good grades you've gotten as motivation. Instead of feeling defeated because your job sucks and you're not rolling around in cash, work hard so you can get your degree and run away to wherever it is you'd rather be. Don't lose sleep over the small stuff; you're going to need your rest. It's crucial to understand that when you're in your teen years (or your twenties, for that matter) no one expects you to have it all figured out, and you probably don't– but eventually, you will.
