This past week has been a battle of the fittest between myself and the horrible, awful demons called kidney stones. I experienced so much pain, tears and even hallucinations during this time. It all started when I was rushed to the emergency room on Monday night by one of my friends, and now we are here — I'm alive and telling this story, so that's good news. This wasn't my first encounter with kidney stones, but I definitely hope it is the last.

When you have kidney stones, the doctor usually prescribes you to some sort of pain medication so that you can actually stand being alive while having the stones. My experience with pain medications starts with hydro and ends with codones. Yes, that's right. I'm talking about hydrocodones, the saint of all saints when it comes to dealing with kidney stones. But what you don't expect are all of the hilarious, delirious moments you will encounter while on hydrocodones.

My experience with hydrocodones started out in the emergency room that Monday night/Tuesday morning, and all I can say is wow. I blinked twice after taking the medication I was given there, and suddenly a whole new world unveiled itself before my eyes. Normally straight objects were twisty and absolutely everything was funny. That's about all I remember from that night/morning.

I knew I was going to be going home for the day on Tuesday and resting. I also knew that I had my first exam in my summer class (Hooray for getting ahead in school!) on Wednesday. What happened in the day that I rested on Tuesday and the time I was somehow alive on Wednesday was legendary. I decided to live tweet the events of Wednesday to my personal Twitter account for all to see. So here are some events that could or could not happen while you are taking hydrocodones. (Side note: Do not take painkillers just for fun or to experience what I am about to detail. That's not cool or healthy.)

You could take some exams — no big deal.

I went to my 11 a.m. class bright-eyed and bushy-tailed (well, maybe I was a little groggy) and took my exam. I had hardly studied for it at all due to the insane amount of sleeping I did the day before, so I was banking on my knowledge received while I was paying attention during lectures of the class. So I took my test without being too concerned about my grade, and after I had finished my test, our professor gave us an hour to go get lunch. Ah, yes. One thing I could still enjoy while on pain medication: food. No, I was horribly wrong — which leads me to my next event.

You could buy some things that you don't remember buying.

You'll notice here that I never mention going back to get said drink (because I didn't) and that I decided to change my hashtag for my friends following the events. This time, I thought I would make it a little more personal by changing the hashtag from #kidneystones to #LandonStones. I thought it was funny, OK? So maybe I had to enjoy my lunch with the Gatorade I had pre-packed in my backpack for the day and didn't get to enjoy that water, but I still got through the day. That's all I was aiming for. I enjoyed my lunch and went back to class for the lecture that started after the lunch break. That's when it hit me.

You'll realize that pain medication makes you sleepy, and you will fight the urge to fall asleep.

This is when I knew that the struggle was real. I am so sorry to anyone that witnessed me almost snoring in Anthropology 111A that day. Of course, I wasn't tweeting this during class — that's just rude. I had to tweet it while I was walking out of the class, and let's just say that stairs are even more of a struggle than staying awake in class while on pain medications.

You will fall. Frequently.

Fortunately, we have created things such as rails along stairs for awkward hydrocodone-taking kidney stoners like myself to grab onto for dear life when attempting to walk. Thank you to the people that created those magnificent rails.

All in all, my experience with hydrocodones this week has been interesting. Feel free to reach out to me on Twitter (@LandonAndrew) with your personal painkiller stories as well! By the way, I made a 94 on that exam, but the kidney stones/hydrocodones still beat me at the end of the day.