We need to be nice to each other, let's just get that out of the way. More importantly, we need to realize the difference between being nice to each other and patronizing each other.

Social media is propagating false equality and patronization. James Gunn, director of the Guardians of the Galaxy movies was recently fired for offensive tweets from 2008, ten years ago. Although they were about some pretty hot topics like pedophilia and rape, they were jokes or attempted ones. I'll be honest, the jokes sucked. It's not even about the content, they just weren't very funny. However, the man directed some amazing movies and he didn't actually hurt anybody (feelings don't count). This is just the latest example of a growing phenomenon on social media that's creeping into every aspect of society from race to sexuality. Everybody is crowded in the same space on the internet and there seems to be a developing etiquette to accommodate literally everybody. It's like a new set of commandments is taking shape, mostly coming from the liberal side which is ironic because demonizing people for their words and thoughts on social media is oppressive and conservative if anything.

Don't get me wrong, the Harvey Weinstein's and Bill Cosby's of the world shouldn't be forgiven, but those were actions in which they used their power to physically violate the liberty and privacy of other people. James Gunn had a bad sense of humor ten years ago (he must've figured it out because his movies are hilarious).

That's the problem today. Rape and jokes about rape are deemed almost equal in severity. Being offended and being raped are treated with the same level of sympathy. It's a crime to be mean on the internet, while the people getting offended are literally fishing for reasons to be outraged. Moses only wrote down ten commandments because ten is about the limit when it comes to keeping creatures as diverse in thought and feeling as human beings on the same page. Don't kill people? Sure. Be faithful? Okay fine, and obviously rape is bad but tell me I can't laugh at a joke and there's a problem. I think most people can get on board with the basics of being a decent person but it gets hairy when we start policing words and thoughts.

Offending people is not a crime and being offended does not make you a victim of anything other than having soft skin. We have over 300 million people in America alone, that means if we don't start looking objectively at ourselves we're actually going to wake up in a George Orwell novel because we're getting dangerously close to enforcing punishment for "thought crimes." It's actually funny because the government watching us through our technology isn't the threat, it's regular people on social media who, with enough momentum, can literally banish someone to the nether regions of society for some sounds they made with their mouths or a series of shapes typed out in a chronology that is deemed too offensive. The guy was fired for his past self's sense of humor. How is that itself not discrimination? If we can give Caitlyn Jenner woman of the year when she was a man six months prior, then James Gunn should certainly be forgiven for a ten-year-old joke.

This is all to say that thought equality itself feels like one big joke, so why don't we all just be equally offensive to each other? That's equality too right? And it happens on its own, no enforcement necessary. It's like when you weren't allowed to chew gum in middle school; gum was the shit. Now I'm in college and I don't think I've chewed a piece of gum in years. People aren't going to be offensive if you let them because people want to do what they're not supposed to. Some people might but who cares? If everybody said the most respectful thing to everybody else all the time, the tension would be unbearable. Being mean is like orgasming. If you're like me, you don't feel the need to do it anymore for at least five hours. But if I feel like I have to be nice to you all the time, I'll grow to actually hate you soon enough. So let's all make fun of each other equally, or at least have the equal opportunity to do so, before offensive thoughts turn into malicious actions.

People aren't one hundred percent nice by nature so when you force people to be, it's like holding in a big societal sneeze and soon our eyeballs are going to explode. If it's equality and fairness everybody wants, then let's all have equal opportunity to say whatever we want. I'm pretty sure I'm not the first to come up with this crazy idea of freedom of speech either. If you're offended by something someone says to you personally, learn how to laugh or learn how to clap back. Offended by something someone says on the internet to no one in particular and can't get over it? You're living on the wrong planet.

One more analogy I promise. I've been in a few friend groups. In some, we all know we can make fun of each other freely and that's how we show our love. Because we're mean to each other constantly, we know it's all good. I've also been in groups where there's this weird, forced niceness. Everybody has to be one hundred percent respectful and supportive of every feeling and emotion of every other person in the group and I've never felt more awkward tension in my life. Our society is the latter group, while human nature is more compatible with the former. So until the James Gunn's start turning into Harvey Weinstein's, we don't have the right to not be offended.