After many years of working hard, I'm finally preparing to graduate at the end of this quarter. Thinking about it is honestly a bit surreal. It feels like I've spent my entire life working toward achieving this goal and the payoff is finally approaching.
This impending graduation has led to several emotions: excitement, relief, anxiety, fear, confusion, and happiness. The idea that I'll be walking away from this experience with an English degree makes me both proud and nervous and has led to some pretty persistent thoughts as the graduation date approaches.
1. "Did I make a huge mistake?"
This one is impossible not to think at least every once in a while, especially with how many concerned looks I get when I tell people "yes, I'm majoring in English. No, I don't want to be a teacher". Honestly, I answer those question far more often than I would like and they get me every... time!
2. "What... do I do now?"
After being in school for nearly my entire life, the prospect of not having school or working toward school is... weird, to say the least. I've always had the next grade or the next level of school to look forward to. But now, with no immediate plans to pursue grad school, I'm left without the familiar comfort and routine of being a student.
3. "How does anyone adult?"
Yes, I know I'm a few years into adulthood. But there's something that feels so different about being an adult in college and an adult out of college. Being an adult out of college leads to scary things like careers. Exciting, of course, but scary.
4. "I can't believe I'm almost done!"
This is a huge accomplishment and something that I've been working toward for years. Like I said, it's so surreal to think about but it definitely deserves some celebration!
5. "So. Much. Debt."
Something tons and tons of students deal with but never want to. College is incredibly expensive and loans are often the only way to pay for it, which leads to more than a fair amount of debt. Yeah, that is a not so exciting part of graduating.
6. "I can't wait to read FOR FUN!"
This might sound like such a nerd thing to say but yeah, I'm super excited to have more free time to read for fun. Reading was what inspired me to even major in English in the first place but the last few years have been spent mostly reading for classes.
7. "I'm so tired."
Seriously, so tired. Just all the time. I'm gonna sleep for a week straight after graduation.
8. "How am I supposed to get a job?"
It feels like there's so much pressure to get a good job after graduation — one that will lead to building a potential career and will pay enough that, you know, you'll actually be able to live somewhat comfortably.
9. "I'm graduating."
Just let that sink in for a moment.
